Entitled non existence parent
So a bit of a backstory first and sorry if its long....
I met my partner online just before the first covid lockdown and its like i met my soulmate. Now because of the covid mixing house rules, we decided to move in together. We just simply didnt want to be apart. Now i live in a 4 bedroom house and at the time there was only myself and my son. His son and daughter were living with their mum with their nana also in a 2 bedroom flat so it was a bit squished to say the least. So they basically came to stay one day amd decided that they wanted to live here as for one they now have a bedroom each.
So a year and a half on and this started early on.. their mother never saw them. They never get a phone call on their birthdays or even such as a card! Shes seen them twice in all that time. Shes always slagging me off, telling me im not allowed to put family photos on social media.. now its only close friemds and family that see these and why shouldnt i show off our family time
I have never once tried to take over as their mum but we have grown close. I basically do all the mum things and treat them as i treat my own son. So like i said shes constantly slagging me off, does not appreciate the fact i am doing her job.
Just getting extremely annoyed. I am dying to say something to her but havnt because of the kids. Now these are just some of the things she has done:
*Lied about her son having an illness to get a house and free things
*Refused to send a form back for child benefit that she has been falsly claiming and doesnt contribute to uniforms or anything.
*She rings up and tries to dictate how we parent.
*Threatened to come to my house amd apparently she was gonna beat me up
*Had a go because i did face masks with her daughter and took her for her hair cut and nails
Im absolutely at the end of my tether.
Apparently im nothing to them and never will be.
Im the one that organises their birthdays, christmas, clean uniforms, Reads them stories and kisses them goodnight etc... so what is her problem? Jealousy? Maybe so.. but we are not stopping her from seeing them.. everytime she organises a visit shes conveniently ill.
Im just so fed up of it all. Sorry for the really long rant. Xx
- Stepmum-b-f-m's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
Ignore her. Block her number,
Ignore her. Block her number, block her on social media, you have no need nor obligation to have any contact with her. If she turns up on your doorstep and threatens you, call the cops. She is feeding off of the drama, so don't give her any.
About her visits, they would be in her home, not yours, I hope.
Oh i have her blocked. She
Oh i have her blocked. She does all this through my partner, ranting at him. See the kids are sick of being let down by her failing to turn up for arranged visits time and time again so they barely give her the time of day. But its her own fault. They have made this descion on their own. But this is our influence apparently which we have in the past encoraged to see her but dont anymore.. we leave it up to them to decide. Shes just a joke
Time he told her that all
Time he told her that all communication will be by email from now on and block her. He doesn't have to listen to her ranting.
I do hope he's not paying her child support.. .
No she said she was going to
No she said she was going to pay us as they want to live with us but so far havnt received a penny.
NiNew tactic from your SO: he
NiNew tactic from your SO: he just sends her the laughing-in-tears emoji every time she goes on a rant. No other words, just that. Or, more civilly, he texts her "since you have abused this form of communication, all communication will now go through email", gives her an email address that he sets up just for her emails, and blocks her.
I get it, though. BM in my life ranted and raved, apparently, about the kind of person I am, none of which was true. She was smart, though, and never said anything to DH because that would have gone over poorly. Now, my YSS lives with us full time because she can't keep her sh*t together. Good riddance to bad rubbish.
I've learned to laugh it all off, but that took a while. Not a whole lot else to do other than limit communication, lower yout expectations of how she'll act, and laugh at the ridiculousness of it all because you (and the kids) likely know better.
What you have is a pathetic bio mum
Or what i call "rent a uterus" because she has no intentions of being an actual mother but just wants to feeeload off other's generosity and the fact she is a single parent despite not caring or raising the kids, but uses them happily for any benefit because they're a cash cow.
so her jealousy is the fact she likely spent her years trash talking your man as not being able to find anyone better than her, because women like this have an inflated view of themselves, then he met you and you're everything she could never attain to be and so she's losing it.
trying to control you and your home environment which falls on deaf ears as it should. Yawn at the constant repeat of her behaviour, because it's pathetic and boring
Thankyou for all the comments
Thankyou for all the comments. Its nice theres support out there and somewhere we can rant lol. Its hard being a steparent but i do love them to bits. They are brilliant kids. He blocked her today as hes had enough aswell so hopefully she gets the hint. I call her the egg donor lol.
Xxx
Egg donor is also a popular term used here.
Pretty much Most people can have kids, but it takes a real parent to raise them.
You can't leave visitation up
You can't leave visitation up to the kids. Do they have a court order spelling out the change in custody and if she has visitation?