All what you are feeling is completely normal and understandable. These are not your children and quite frankly you have just meet them not long ago. A bond between you guys will  take time to develop in a deep level. If anything right now you should treat them as the children of a close friend or something.
Personally I would never sleep or share a bed with my children (biological or steps) unless they are babies, simply because our bed is our place as a couple, is not a place for children. If my son wants to cuddle. I lay with him in his bed for a bit before he goes to sleep sometimes or we cuddle while watching a movie in the lounge. Plus, sleeping with a child that's not mine would make me extremely uncomfortable, it's just not right. 

 I would be quite put off if my husband was cuddling in bed with a 4 and 7yo every morning ! They are not babies anymore and that early in the morning he should be cuddling you lol ! 

You are never going to have bios with this guy. He wants you to only worship his kids so, of course, he won't want kids with you. His are far too precious to have to live with others. I am truly sorry that he forced you into an abortion. 

You're only a few months into this relationship, you've already seen you come a long way behind his kids... Do you really want to spend your life being bounced on every Sunday morning? I'd cut my losses and find someone who puts me first. 

PS - go back to sleeping in the nude if you are comfortable like that. BM will probably put an end to the weekend cuddles when she finds out! 

:) 

Welcome.  There is a lot going on here - but the big issue isn't the kids in the bed several mornings per week.  Consider stepping back from this relationship and moving back into your own place and doing a reset.  You don't have to break off the relationship, but this would give you space to think about what YOU want for your life.  I know this is hard to hear.  Wish you the best.

He forced you into an abortion? Deal breaker. Plus you shouldn't be sleeping with unrelated children. If BM wants, she can use that against you by making false charges of abuse. Please put yourself first as no one else is.

You're not wrong. I felt the same way about unrelated kids in the bed. In fact, I refused to spend the night with my now-DH until he got his kids to sleep and stay in their own room.  I would never sleep in the bed with an unrelated child, and I also wouldn't want them waking me up and pushing me out of my own bed in the morning. 

My bigger issue would be managing to live with a guy who made me feel forced to have an abortion.  If you want your own kids, move on and find a guy who wants kids with you, and not just at the perfect time.

Nope, you are not wrong.

But this guy is the wrong guy for you and you know it.

It's just one of those things, nuclear families don't operate the same as step-families.  There is really nothing unusual with getting up for morning cuddles or play time with parents in a nuclear home at those ages.  It doesn't seem like they spend the night-THAT is a big no-no IMO.  I have very sweet memories of us 3 kids jumping up in bed early morning with my parents- First part was cuddling, but then we would get rowdy and eventually my mom would get up and dad would wrestle with all of us.  We were probably 5-7-9 ages.  I don't remember it happening much past in that house (we then moved overseas). 

My DH and I sleep with our dogs too-if anyone told me they can't sleep in the bed I'd show them the door.  All that said, you have a few issues here.  These are not your biological children!  It will and should feel odd for you.  Some different approaches have to take place when a step is in the picture.  What would be ideal is he starts slowing them down, say maybe only Sat morning-that way you can get up do your own thing-but it shouldn't stop him from doing what he does entirely.

This is one of those things, the step-parents gets inconvenienced and weirded out by it, but then if it stops, the kids miss out on those moments with the parent.  Step-parenting is UNNATURAL for every person involved, period, no argument.

Your dh's dog also needs to lose weight, I have not met ONE lab that wasn't severely over-weight, a standard male shouldn't be more then 80lbs (36Kg)-  Even then, I would let that go, if you don't like it, don't sleep in the bed.  It's not fair to ask him to remove the dog IMO.

Bed size, if you intend to stay in the relationship, consider getting no less then a king size bed. Even if kids aren't in the bed, you two and a large dog, you'll need it.

Everything else you are feeling, is completely and entirely normal.  The honeymoon stage w/skids dwindles down and we start feeling differently.  Get the book Stepmonster, read it cover to cover and have your partner read it.  Or read it and understand this isn't the relationship for you.

NOW as to the abortion, THAT part just broke my heart and made me so angry for you!  HOw dare he!  Did you guys discuss having kids?  Did he already say he wanted no more kids?  How old are you?  IMO, if you have no kids, go out there and find a partner with which you can have your OWN nuclear family with, and enjoy all the firsts without previous bagagge/kids/ex-wives.  A husband who will be excited to share a child with you and not just praise his previous kids and dismiss yours together (it happens a LOT in blended families).  He's shown you you are disposable to him.  

I always say this, these divorced men are very clever, THEY dont' want women with kids themselves but want single/young women to bring on as babysitters, bed-warmers and maids, have all these expectations on how she should treat his kids, never discipline.  They RUIN young women's lives.  Women with no kids should always look for men w/out kids themselves.  People with children should end up with people with children, for the most part.

You are sacrificing entirely too much of your life, for what will be a mediocre to shit*y satisfactory relationship, and you deserve all that world has to offer.  

My dh and I both had kids when we met- we both agree, there is NOTHING better than an intact, nuclear home. We both came from one, my brothers aren't divorced either.  I see the difference in how my brothers/wife's kids turned out vs mine...even though my divorce was the best option (he was abusive)- there were still very real repercussions for my sons.  

You can find and be happy 100pct with a man with no children.  I strongly suggest moving on and living your best life, not one riddled by step-bullshi*t.  Is it worth it to always be unhappy?  

Him basically forcing you into an abortion is wrong on so many levels. This alone would be reason enough for me to leave. 

On top of that, no one should be sleeping with unrelated children. Period. Unless you want allegations thrown at you.

Luckily you don't own the place together. I would move out and dump this guy ASAP.

So he has you cooking, cleant, parenting, being available for sex, AND you're paying for stuff for them all. AND he has the gall to say that if you don't continue doing it all and shut up about it he'll break up with you? He is using you and gaslighting you about it. 

Stop doing it all for him. He doesn't appreciate you. Move out - keep dating him if you want, but move out and take back your life. 

Sometimes love just isn't enough. 

This relationship will never fulfill you the way you deserve.  I was your age when I became a childless stepmom.  Find my blog.  It's bad; but it's true.  My partner also told me he wanted kids but didn't really.  I struggled and finally had a bio after much debate and me threatening to leave.  Guess who paid 90% of the fertility bills and does 95% of the child rearing but makes less and works just as much ?

This man keeps you around because you're cheaper than hired help.  You tell him you're not cut out to be a free nanny/chef/maid/activity planner.  

go find a good partner who respects you , have kids and spend your time, money, and energy on them ! 

Sweety I say this with knowledge and experience and hopefully in the kindest way I know how. Get out of this relationship.

Im in my 50's and 7 years in. THIS IS THE HONEYMOON period and it wont get any better, it will get worse.

I wish I had the opportunity to have my own children and sincerely regret not exploring and trying. It may seem like you love him, but I would seek a therapist to find out if you are simply co-dependant. 

He isnt a good partner to you. He is USING YOU. What he is doing is gaslighting you, in hopes of diverting and turning things around on you. He doesnt want you to leave. He has you under his control somehow.

Leave. Get your own place. Stop paying for the kids and taking care of them. Get your stuff out and to a friends, if you cannot leave immediately.