If you were to ask my thoughts on becoming a step mum I will happily scream at you “DON’T DO IT’ unless of course you love doing the work of two people, being compared to a women you don’t know on a regular basis and love not having an opinion in any aspect of your life, start dressing like an evil Disney step mother because this is the job for you.

Being a step mum has been the most rewarding yet the most depressing and anxiety riddled years of my life, I took in four children fulltime as well as my own two boys I quit my career and moved over an hour and a half away from my amazing and supporting family. Why would I do this you ask? who am I kidding I ask myself that daily, but the bottom line is I do it because I met a man who was exactly what I wanted in a life partner and him being extremely good looking helps as well! But had I known the complications that come along with this amazing human being I may have thought twice and run in the opposite direction.

I care for these little creatures as if they were my own, I do the daily mundane life of school runs, school events, lunches, assemblies, you name it I do it! Yet every single member of their extended family likes to remind me on a constant basis in one way or another I am not their mum, At first I brushed it aside as its just the settling in period but as time goes on I am learning to except this is just my place in this large family I am only seen as their live in babysitter, Although slightly depressing and infuriating I am lucky the children are amazing and love me as a main adult in their life and I wouldn’t change them for the world!

My worries in this bonus parent role differ from the average, I am in an eternal struggle of I must of done something right in a past life to deserve this man and quickly change to bugger me I was an evil dictator yup definitely an evil dictator, why must it all be so dramatic I have a great co parenting relationship with my ex and I can safely say we are friends and I make it my weekly mission to know my sons bonus mum will never feel the way I feel or is put into the position I am with my partner and his family. When will it change? is there a time when people pull their heads out of their butts and are grateful their grandchildren, nieces/ nephews are being exposed to a loving, supportive family and given a chance to a somewhat normal family experience that is extended with more people who will love them and support them, will they ever acknowledge me as a person or shall I just start my collection of evil step mother capes and practice my evil laugh if I’m being portrayed as one you best believe I’m dressing as the part.

I don’t know the purpose of this ** apart from a bad day and needing to write down the mess in my mind before I end up screaming at the top of my lungs but If you know someone who is on this bonus parent journey be kind, un judgemental and most of all please do not compare them to anyone although we are playing a replica role we are own person and majority of the time putting up with an unprecedented amount of  petty crap behind the scenes be KIND send WINE !