Runaway reaches an all new level of "Dumb"..
DH spoke to his parents today. They informed him that SD18 and BFF (they work at the chicken plant together..) have opened a joint bank account, purchased a car (co-signed by BFF BIL)with over 200,000 miles on it AND the 2 are renting a house (right around the freaking corner from us)!!!!!!!!!
You know..."Cause its only $800 a month rent.." is what she told GMA. Supposedly SD18 got mad at GMA and GPA because they told her what an idiot she is for creating all of these bills. And I'm quite confident SD & BFF haven't thought about car maintenance, gas, insurance, utilities, food, renters insurance...it can go on and on.
She told GMA that she just wants everyone to be proud of her...
And SD begins begging GMA for money in 3...2...1....
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Smell the sweet scent of
Smell the sweet scent of disengagement, Brady.
Leave them to their circle jerk. It doesn't affect you.
Honestly, I'm gagging more of
Honestly, I'm gagging more of the thought of her being right around the corner lol
Honestly? I think GMA and GPA
Honestly? I think GMA and GPA had the wrong reaction.
SD got a job, got a place to live, and got a vehicle. That's not dumb; that's adulting. That's the thing everyone has been trying to get SD to do.
"Sounds like you're really trying to make this work, SD. Keep us posted on how it's going."
Nice, neutral response that sends the message that SD is on the right track even if the steps she is taking aren't the most responsible. Actually, what she's doing sounds like a mistake many young folks make and experience teaches them that the specific decision (like financing a car with 200,000 miles on it) was poor, even if the whole experience was positive.
I agree. but I also know this
I agree. but I also know this is the kid that probably thinks water fills the toilet magically.
I told DH, let her figure it out. The PROBLEM is she will continue to get bailed out. And maybe their knee jerk reaction of not being on board is because they know as well as I do this will end up costing GMA and GPA a hell of a lot of money in the end.
Oh I get it. This is a
Oh I get it. This is a vicious cycle of treating SD like a poor widdle COD, then getting mad at her for acting like a poor widdle COD, then getting MORE mad at her when she stops acting like a poor widdle COD, and then feeling sorry for her again because she's a poor widdle COD. Repeat cycle ad nauseam until the end of time.
It only costs GMA and GPA if they bail her out. No sympathy for them on that front.
I think that is the part
I think that is the part about everything you are going through that irks me the most. The grandparents are total enablers, and she is just there taking advantage in any and every way possible.
You can't MAKE the grandparents stop, you certainly can't make SD actually do the right thing when it comes to anything! You are just there, watching a train wreck, almost helpless to stop it because anything you say will be turned against you because poor SD, even though she made mistakes, its because she is a CoD.
I swear all of her drama would make me want to move. Just pick a spot on the map and sell my house and go, far away.
Okay do not take this the
Okay do not take this the wrong way at all, but, to be fair she has a job, a car, a place to live and she's not asking you for money. As for all the drama that will come from it, just be glad it's someplace else and not in your house.
I always figured Spawn would end up a meth head baby momma like Meth Mouth. Instead Spawn has a job (she switches every six months) she has a place to live (low income apartments with gang banger boytoy) a vehicle (old beater) and money (from selling drugs...lol no clue if that's accurate). I personally never thought she would even amount to that, so I guess she sure showed me.
I agree and completely
I agree and completely understand your point. If she's shacked up at BFF's they're not happy, if she's attempting to make her own way, they're not happy. Maybe she will show them all. Highly unlikely, but the flip side of this is they (GMA GPA AND DH) have never prepared her for ANYTHING.
What I would truly like to see (and I know it won't happen) is for everyone to quit bailing her out. She wants so much to prove how successful she is, but then can't even make herself an apointment to see a doctor when she's sick. She couldn't even pay her $25 copay less than 3 weeks ago..now suddenly she's up to her ears in bills? We'll see....
She's made some mistakes, but
She's made some mistakes, but it sounds like she's making an effort, even if it isn't the way most people would go. Chicken plants usually pay well, because the job sucks and involves specific protocols. There is also more room for advancement than most would assume.
I think you should suggest that DH show support for her right now, and sit down and go over a budget with her. He hasn't been great at teaching her real life skills, but now that she's showing some initiative, he should run with it. I might even suggest he pay for a subscription to YNAB or a similar tool for her as a gesture of goodwill. Like, I'm not going to bail you out, but I will fund this one thing that'll help you not have to be bailed out, and what you do with that is up to you.
HA good luck with that- the
HA good luck with that- the man purposely keeps his own daughters social security card from her....even the replacement one- I doubt for one sec he's going to do a THING to help prepare her for the future. OP- this sd is just a clear representation of how dad has raised her (or not).
They financed a car that has
They financed a car that has over 200,000 miles on it? And, needed a co-signer?
Joint bank account?
She's doing things that she thinks makes her a responsible adult but... she's going about it all wrong. Either because she has not been taught any better, or won't listen. It's kind of expected, she's 18 and has no guidance, but the joint account with the BFF floors me. I don't even have a joint bank account with DH and we've been together for 23 years!
My SD28 thinks she is adulting but she is really just a big 'ol co-dependent, living off of the government and getting bailed out by BM when needed. But she's independent, just ask her.
Your SD will learn a hard lesson but if that's the only way she will learn, that's the only way.
Yep
The Gir and Animal Torturer are "strong, independent women" (who rely on wallet marriages and CS) Animal Torturer is probably leeching off of Battleaxe Gallactica. Her apt search ended when she found out it cost real money.