I have been in a relationship for just over 10 months now. He moved in with me nearly right away, I've known him 20 years and we had came into contact again online. There is a background story needed in this because of all that has happened over the last year. My 18 year old son was murdered on Sept 8, my bf and I consumated our relationship the night of Sept 7 (we had both been drinking) we had been talking just over 1 month again but there was an instant connection. That night while I was sleeping at his place I received the call about my son telling me to get to the hospital immediately that my son was hurt but stable. I thought he had just gotten in a fight, no idea what i was walking into.  My bf offered to come  with me, I allowed him to. When getting to hospital we waited 3 hours before i found out anything watching the cops in and out if icu and wondering what the heck happened that i was waiting at the icu. I knew something bad had happened and i was extremely anxious but wouldnt in my worst nightmare have thought it was what the cops and dr were going to tell me. He came in the room with me when they told me my son had been shot and he had brain damage, would not recover and was on life support. I felt like i was outside of myself. The entire time we spent at the hospital he didnt leave mine and my other childrens side, he made us laugh and made us not focus so much on everything we were going through. Coming back home 2 days later after he had been taken off life support and organs donated, planning his funeral etc, he didnt leave our side.  I knew that we were moving too fast but i didn't want to be without him, i needed to be strong for my other children and not fall apart. He and my other kids held me together. He is going threw a very messy break up with distribution of property. His ex is bipolar and seems to cry all the time or have freak outs in front of his daughter. In turn his daughter has learned this behaviour from her mother and that it gets her attention. She doesnt get much attention from her own mother. When his daughter comes here she is well behaved for the most part but whines and crys and has yelling fits and blaming fits over the smallest things. One example was she was walking with a bathing suit on carrying a water bottle, it splashed on her a little and she went onto the ground into a crying fit and whining for a solid 5 minutes, when asked why she was crying about getting wet she explained in a loud whiney voice that she doesnt like getting wet unless its in a pool, i reminded her that she was in a sprinkler only a few days prior and she continued to whine and cry saying that she just doesnt like it. My 13 year old daughter and her friend then started splashing eachother with the water bottle which finally got her laughing and snapped her out of it. That is just one example of many. We just picked her up from her grammas and within 15 minutes she had found 2 things to whine and pout about that were rediculous. I have suggested to my bf when she gets like that, rather then playing the poor girl suck up dad to her to put her in the bedroom to collect herself and give her a book to read or paper and crayons to draw how she is feeling out to calm her down. He has tried implementing these things but has also explained that he feels guilty because he knows she doesnt get the attention she needs at her mother's. I explained that the behaviour will continue and get worse if he continues to allow it and he understands but often apologizes to her for disciplining her when she gives him the silent treatment after and pouts. It has gotten to a point that my 15 year old son doesnt want to come here when she is here and wants to stay at his dads because he can't stand her whining.  I can't stand it either and it is effecting my relationship with my bf. Im really starting to resent him for his cater to the baby whine parenting style and it is now coming to a head as it is effecting my relationship with seeing my son.  My daughter cant stand the whining either. Help what to do!