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Easter fun

Ginger_SM's picture

Submitted by Ginger_SM on Sun, 04/21/2019 - 12:31pm

I'm learning exactly where BM learned all her BS from. Her mother is just a much a piece of work. 

So, she asked if she could drop off Easter baskets to the girls yesterday morning. I said we have plans so that time doesn't work. When we were available I said we were but apparently she wasn't.  Then on our way home pretty late she asks if she can drop them off. We say no because it is too late. The question of today came up and we said no because we are just going to focus on the Holiday. 

Well I wake to the girls having Easter baskets not from us. I didn't get up super late but I laid in bed a little extra this morning because I didn't sleep super well last night but thus she made sure to come before we woke up apparently. She text OSD that she would be here in 25 minutes without asking our permission. Mind everything BMs family asks is through the girls, which is another problem. 

It just bugs me because it is just her forcing her hand. But you bet your ass no more time will be given because to me that shows a complete lack of respect. 

Plus we got crap from BMs attorney last night trying to just go with all this BS.. Happy Holidays for us!! 

Comments

ndc's picture

Submitted by ndc on Sun, 04/21/2019 - 3:59pm

Maybe there's some backstory here that would explain a lack of cooperation (in fact, I'm assuming there is).

But . . . I can understand a grandparent doing this.  She tried to go through you.  She called and tried a few different times, none of which worked.  All of Easter day didn't work for you.  This is a grandparent wanting to give a grandchild an Easter basket.  Not a day-after-Easter basket.  She probably figured this was her only option.  Is it right?  Maybe not, but it's certainly understandable.

Monkeysee's picture

Submitted by Monkeysee on Mon, 04/22/2019 - 3:21am

Why couldn’t grandma give the Easter baskets to BM if it was so important? No reason she couldn’t have dropped them off previously.

lieutenant_dad's picture

Submitted by lieutenant_dad on Mon, 04/22/2019 - 10:00am

Why is it okay for this GBM to usurp Dad saying no?

Whatever his reasons are for saying no, he is the parent and has the right to dictate who is around his children on his custody time. Doesn't matter that GBM had an innocent enough excuse. He had reasons for saying no, and she ignored him.

And she not only ignored him, but she snuck onto his property and manipulated the children to disregard what their father said. She majorly stepped over boundaries, and there is no dancing around that with "oh, well, it's Easter".

Not every grandparent has their grandchild's best interest at heart. Not every grandparent should have access to their grandkids. Dad made the decision that, on his custody time, he wasn't going to deal with GBM. That should be the end of it.

OP, your DH should have an attorney send her a certified letter telling GBM that she is no longer allowed on your property. It's one thing to show up and leave gift baskets on thr front porch. It's another to contact the children behind their father's back and give them their baskets sneakily.

Ginger_SM's picture

Submitted by Ginger_SM on Mon, 04/22/2019 - 6:38pm

It wasn't that we weren't willing to cooperate yesterday. It just didn't work out. 

Today we wanted to avoid all drama. Thus just wanting to focus on our family today. It is more the fact BM constantly tries to impose on our very little time. Kind of outlined in my last post. 

It did also bother me that she basically made sure to give them hers before ours. We just feel she should send it to her daughters house for when the girls get there. It is not our responsibility to facilitate BMs moms time. As far as I'm concerned, especially with how they go about things with DH and myself. Just consistent overstepping. 

Ginger_SM's picture

Submitted by Ginger_SM on Mon, 04/22/2019 - 6:37pm

Lieutenant_dad that's exactly how I feel! I understand wanting to give it to the grandkids but you should not disregard or try to sneak around Dad on his time. 

We were going to go up to the in laws which is an hour away but DH didn't want to spend his limited time traveling more than necessary..  after that we wished we had. But we shouldn't have to run to have them respect our boundaries. 

But we already have an ongoing legal thing with BM because she wants to play game and DH and I fully intend on bringing it up with our attorney.