A small child does not have control over their looks. But they do grow up and that is now always true. SS34 was the most adorable young boy (I've seen pictures). He was still attractive in his early 20s. He now looks like a disgusting homeless bum - years of drinking and drugs can do that. SS's utter disipation is totally on him.
But I am also the person that thinks that almost all little kids are cute - even some of the so called "ugly" ones are so different that they are cute.
Any time i see a woman out with kids i assume they are hers unless blatantly obvious that they arent. My husband is very good looking so i thought maybe her looks would even out as she got a bit older but, no such luck yet.
Lol, funny thought but yeah, id definitely NEVER let her know i feel this way. I suppose i should have added that i always tell her she's pretty, etc. I don't want to make her feel bad ever.
I'm only embarrassed when we go out to eat, which we haven't done in ages. SD11 and SS10 can't figure out how to chew with their mouths closed despite 5, almost 6 YEARS of nagging and being sent to complete their meals in the kitchen instead of at the table. DH is just as on them as me - I have no idea why they don't get it. Although since SD11 has been eating lunch with "Brian" that she met this year, her table manners, teeth brushing, and hair brushing have all improved significantly. I wonder why?
SD weirdly enough looks a LOT like me. When we go out just the three of us (her, DH and I), people actually say "oh my goodness she's a spitting image of mom!!!" (referring to me) and we just laugh and say thank you. I knew my husband way before BM did... We were best friends in middle/high school than he went off and had a child with BM, then we met up later in life. I like to tell him he must've had a crush on me back then and looked for someone who was similar, because BM is a less cute version of me
well Aergia is not an oil painting, I give crap if people think she's my daughter or not..... if they ask, I will say, she looks like her mother and I'm not it.....
People are not so judgmental bout look over here, we work on personalities and believe me it shows through the face..
According to this Aergia is the ugliest person alive... competes with BM... but does not bother me at all... it's them not me
Looks-wise, I'm only embarrassed by how they do their hair and their clothes. Other than that, I'm embarrassed by their rudeness to adults when we're out, but I've long ago given up taking them anywhere where polite, respectful, and interested interactions with other human beings is required. ie. anywhere.
No. I was never embarassed by how they looked. I was embarassed however by how they behaved. They could be very rude, pushy, entitled, and lacked manners in general.
Some of the most homely little ones can grow up to be super models. My bride was a stunning toddler, a knock kneed gawky and gangly little girl and an absolutely stunning young woman. She is now a classically beautiful statuesque woman who takes my breath away, the breath of many others, every day.
At her 20th HS reunion I had several of her classmates aproach me and share they they had a huge crush on her in Jr. high and HS but never asked her out. To this day she maintains that she was not poplular and no one from school ever asked her out. Her family was always on the ragged edge of poverty, she was not confident and though she did well in HS she was of the mind that being an unwed teen mom at 16 would be all her classmates would recall of her. Only her friends even mentioned the kid. The rest of her classmates were enamored with her... still. They gravitated to her at her 10th HS reunion and she was the star of her 20th. I have never doubted how amazing she is. And I find the pics of her as an awkward and frequently unfortunate looking child to be extremely cute.
So, just because a kid is in a unattractive stage of life does not mean they will not become a beautiful adult, both in appearance and character. Particularly if they are loved with strong and effective parenting and adult examples.
Embarrassed by something that
Embarrassed by something that the child has zero control over. :? :? :? :? :?
A small child does not have
A small child does not have control over their looks. But they do grow up and that is now always true. SS34 was the most adorable young boy (I've seen pictures). He was still attractive in his early 20s. He now looks like a disgusting homeless bum - years of drinking and drugs can do that. SS's utter disipation is totally on him.
But I am also the person that thinks that almost all little kids are cute - even some of the so called "ugly" ones are so different that they are cute.
Are you more worried about
Are you more worried about people thinking you helped create the little homely thing?
Yes, thats the root of it.
Yes, thats the root of it. Not proud of my feelings, just want to figure out how to cope with it.
Interesting. It never even
Interesting. It never even occurred to me that people would automatically assume that my SD was my kid and that I should be embarrassed by her looks.
Any time i see a woman out
Any time i see a woman out with kids i assume they are hers unless blatantly obvious that they arent. My husband is very good looking so i thought maybe her looks would even out as she got a bit older but, no such luck yet.
Some kids are just not cute.
Some kids are just not cute. Usually it's because their behavior is atrocious.
Maybe you can get a t shirt that says "Not my kid!" with an arrow pointing to your right.
I'm just kidding, kinda.
Haha, that's what I was
Haha, that's what I was thinking, too, a shirt that says, 'I'm the step mom.'
Lol, funny thought but yeah,
Lol, funny thought but yeah, id definitely NEVER let her know i feel this way. I suppose i should have added that i always tell her she's pretty, etc. I don't want to make her feel bad ever.
I'm only embarrassed when we
I'm only embarrassed when we go out to eat, which we haven't done in ages. SD11 and SS10 can't figure out how to chew with their mouths closed despite 5, almost 6 YEARS of nagging and being sent to complete their meals in the kitchen instead of at the table. DH is just as on them as me - I have no idea why they don't get it. Although since SD11 has been eating lunch with "Brian" that she met this year, her table manners, teeth brushing, and hair brushing have all improved significantly. I wonder why?
SD weirdly enough looks a LOT
SD weirdly enough looks a LOT like me. When we go out just the three of us (her, DH and I), people actually say "oh my goodness she's a spitting image of mom!!!" (referring to me) and we just laugh and say thank you. I knew my husband way before BM did... We were best friends in middle/high school than he went off and had a child with BM, then we met up later in life. I like to tell him he must've had a crush on me back then and looked for someone who was similar, because BM is a less cute version of me
well Aergia is not an oil
well Aergia is not an oil painting, I give crap if people think she's my daughter or not..... if they ask, I will say, she looks like her mother and I'm not it.....
People are not so judgmental bout look over here, we work on personalities and believe me it shows through the face..
According to this Aergia is the ugliest person alive... competes with BM... but does not bother me at all... it's them not me
Looks-wise, I'm only
(sorry, just realised this is a zombie thread)
Looks-wise, I'm only embarrassed by how they do their hair and their clothes. Other than that, I'm embarrassed by their rudeness to adults when we're out, but I've long ago given up taking them anywhere where polite, respectful, and interested interactions with other human beings is required. ie. anywhere.
Yes, mainly due to his lack
Yes, mainly due to his lack of hygeine though.
No. I was never embarassed by
No. I was never embarassed by how they looked. I was embarassed however by how they behaved. They could be very rude, pushy, entitled, and lacked manners in general.
Some of the most homely
Some of the most homely little ones can grow up to be super models. My bride was a stunning toddler, a knock kneed gawky and gangly little girl and an absolutely stunning young woman. She is now a classically beautiful statuesque woman who takes my breath away, the breath of many others, every day.
At her 20th HS reunion I had several of her classmates aproach me and share they they had a huge crush on her in Jr. high and HS but never asked her out. To this day she maintains that she was not poplular and no one from school ever asked her out. Her family was always on the ragged edge of poverty, she was not confident and though she did well in HS she was of the mind that being an unwed teen mom at 16 would be all her classmates would recall of her. Only her friends even mentioned the kid. The rest of her classmates were enamored with her... still. They gravitated to her at her 10th HS reunion and she was the star of her 20th. I have never doubted how amazing she is. And I find the pics of her as an awkward and frequently unfortunate looking child to be extremely cute.
So, just because a kid is in a unattractive stage of life does not mean they will not become a beautiful adult, both in appearance and character. Particularly if they are loved with strong and effective parenting and adult examples.