Ugh my ss9's biomom is the same way - no wonder he disrespects me because I'm sure he hears his mom talk that way about me all the time - she refers to me as whore, bitch, the old woman (I'm five years older than he is and she was five years younger LOL) She is in a relationship herself but I swear she has never left him go or figures if she couldnt' have him - noone else will I dunno but I've never met her either and it's been almost six years that I've been in my dh's life - She goes between 'she can't be around my son' to now she keeps trying to set up dinners that 'I have to attend' but I say 'NO WAY IN HELL'  - I am not taking the chance she will turn ugly while eating out. She's mean and manipulative.

Red flags throughout this entire post. Darling your BF is the issue like the other posters pointed out. He is allowing BM to rule and dictate every part of his life. She says jump and he yells how high. It begs to question what man will leave their pregnant 8 month GF in the gas station??? What man leaves after the birth of his child because BM demanded of his time?

Regardless if BM is manipulative and toxic your BF accepting this and allowing it is ten times worse. Please seek some therapy and try to understand why you would allow him to treat you so poorly.This man has no boundaries and no b@lls because they are in BM's purse.....smh.

Your BF is the one who needs to grow up. And get some balls.

Let my husband drop me off at some frickin' gas station to appease BM and see what happens!

I know how those types are, BM over here was a nightmare. DH timed his pick ups and drop offs just right because she was such a bitch if he was even minutes early or late. But, drop me off at a gas station? NOPE. Leave my side after surgery because BM dangles an extra day? Nope.

As others have said, your issues are not really with BM.  Your BF is 100% responsible for his own actions.  He has shown you who he is, where you stand with him, and how he intends to treat you.  What do you intend to do?

The others are right, but your BF is right, too - if he stands up to her, she will use the kid as a pawn and keep him away.  So he should be prepared to enforce his visitation rights and have an attorney on speed dial.

That being said, if he wants to keep any woman in his life, he needs to set boundaries with BM.

Wait a minute - surely I misread.  Your boyfriend left you at a gas station when you were 8 months pregnant so you wouldn't be in the car at dropoff against his ex-wife's wishes?  And he's still your boyfriend?  

Your boyfriend is acting like an ass.  HE is the problem.  No self-respecting man would treat the woman he supposedly loves that way.  You need to make it more painful for him to cross you than to cross her.  He needs to stiffen his spine and stop letting his ex have so much power over him.  Otherwise you may decide it's better to be his ex than his girlfriend.

Wow. If my boyfriend ever left me at a gas station that would be the last day of a relationship. That is an absolute dealbreaker let alone the birth of your baby. I would say if he doesn’t set limits with her you need to walk and he can have two part time kids. This is only gonna get worse. Can you imagine raising your baby in this environment where you both come second to his ex 

Does he have a green card or citizenship or any legal status? I am thiking the answer is no.

Somehow this man makes babies yet cannot work out how courts work. He is more scared of losing his son than losing his daughter. And the opposite of love isn't hate, it is indifference. When she raves on he should be ignoring her and not live in fear of her wrath. I bet he is here illegally and this is her control mechanism.

Your bf is the problem here and has to man up. I’ve lived in the country (with my 2 kids) only for almost 2 years now and the only thing I had was my marriage certificate and needed to adjust my immigration status after the wedding, my DH took advantage of that and I had no say , I Felt used and abused but stood up to the situation took a lawyer etc... then DH started realizing he couldn’t use that against me because nothing was gonna stop me, a lot changed since then, things aren’t perfect but there’s been a lot of improvement. I’d advice you give your bf an ultimatum , if the situation doesn’t change do what’s best for you and your daughter 

I literally had to buy a book on step parenting and blended families and read parts to DH before he started to believe anything other than his own opinion,

your task is trying different approaches to get him to hear you. It can’t continue this way. 

It doesn't seem like you are going to leave him any time soon, so in the meantime complete your licensing, find a better paying job, and get your ducks in a row for whenever you do decide to leave this toxic relationship. Lets see how long you will stand in this dynamic. It takes a toll after a while.

That this idiot continually serves himself, his wife, his marriage and his young child up to his XW and their failed family breeding experiment and tolerates their toxic crap is nauseating.

smh

Failed families are failed families for a reason, or likely many reasons, and a new marriage and young children should never be subjugated to or sacrificed for those past mistakes.

If the SO that brings that baggage to a new marriage/family is too stupid to have learned from their experiences and too much of a coward to protect their new marriage and family from their past mistakes then good riddance to that entire shallow and polluted gene pool.

IMHO of course.