Because he’d been robbed by exwife from having contact with his daughters and she tried then to initiate first meet at her home. I persuaded hubby don’t do it, she’s only after to cover her ass from all the bullshit she told her daughters and control the conversation. Your kids have been brainwashed enough that they need to be on their own with you to open their eyes. By the 2nd/3rd meet i just started getting fedup being roped in.

hubby hasn’t told off his daughters even that first contact that your mum has no right to dictate my new wife be present or that you can’t come to my home, she’s out of line. Hubby doesn’t want the drama and doesn’t like confrontation and his ex knows it and plays this to her strengths. 

I’ve tried telling hubby about this and he knows i’m speaking the truth but it would hurt him if he did a 360 and told his girls the truth and they cut off contact because they’re still under mums control and hypnosis bullshit.

i spoke to my dad today about things to vent and dad just said its hard for hubby because his previous marriage was in no way normal so he’s learning with me what the proper dynamics should be. He doesn’t understand yet he should communicate with me what he wants to do because these visits rob valuable time he could be spending with our kids at home that the elder 3 could easily visit but instead he caves into ex wife without realising it.

My dad suggested the next time i choose to visit the kids that i should just out of nowhere say why don’t you come to our home to visit, if they say well mum won’t let us then say well she has no right to do that and is going against a previous court order running off with you in the first place for 7 yrs and your mum is banning you from getting to know your own siblings, thats wrong 100% and she has no right to do that. We need to try and make these girls see reason because they know their mum lied but they still blindly follow her

dad is kind of suggesting that next time hubby asks i visit them to say no because we waste a whole day out when he can easily ask they come over but chooses not to to avoid confrontation with his kids. I told dad if i bring up their mum being out of line banning them from visiting their siblings based on nothing, hubby could get angry with me and not support me meaning we end up in a fight at a restaurant which will likely result in me leaving with the kids and going home while he spends time alone with them... so frustrating 

there wasn’t much talking going on. It was the same  sort of awkward silence which is understandable considering these girls have been isolated from normal people and normal interaction their whole lives

i’m just hoping when hubby has his own time with the kids after a while he’ll realise why do you not make the effort to visit our kids or ask about them? I trust hubby in the sense he wouldn’t go back to exwife, that chapter is 100% done but the eldest daughter keeps out of the blue casually sending pics of her dad before marrying me when they were young like she’s reminding him of the good old times except they were mostly not good at all. She makes it like oh i just happened to come across these pics and just thought you’d like to see them, hubby destroyed any pics of previous life, theres no physical photo albums (exwife would have burned/destroyed everything). Every now and then she reminds her dad not to forget paying them child support, that their mum’s life was ruined when hubby divorced her. Well maybe if your mum actually cared for hubby and you all hubby wouldn’t have needed to divorce her

my concern is at times i feel the kids still hope their parents will get back together again and they’re painting this positive innocent image when that might not necessarily be the case so i am hesitant to believe everything they claim

at the time hubby had so much taken out of him going through a divorce with exwife and her lawyer suing him for everything that hubby just didn’t even know what she wanted anymore, she was all over the place and no defined focus what she was after in the divorce, then claimed having custody of all 3 was too much work so court ok’d son moving with the dad as he was almost a teen and expressed to live with his dad.

then one day after kids went to school, mum goes to marriage registry office and gets married in front of an official with ex high school boyfriend and kids come from school and get told that she got married and they have a new dad. Who does that to kids?? She bragged afterwards to all of hubbys family and friends how in demand she was and could easily get a man right after the divorce like weeks after divorce was final. That noone wanted her ex husband and then 5yrs later exhusband remarries to a caucasian woman much younger and more educated than her and it was a total slap in the face for her all this bullshit she spun and the girls caught her out and she’s now been in damage control. She went from an ex-husband who  was not at all controlling and gave her freedom to a strict controlling policeman who dictates what her kids with my hubby can or can’t do. Exwife has always been someone who wanted to be very social and free of any home responsibilities so maybe current husband realy woke her up that she screwed up with exhusband and took his generosity and good nature for granted

from what the girls told hubby, it appears their mum isn’t happy in her current marriage and she’s as usual trying to protect her assets and interests like she did last time. She knew she was headed for a divorce or dumping and is out to scheme and steal her way through whatever her hubby earned even before meeting her. So she knows ex husband is way loaded thanbefore and starts using the kids against him. Problem is he’s married with some more kids so can’t be screwed as easily.

hubby doesn’t even want to cut off child support, he believes he’s helping the eldest out instead of teaching them independence which made me gt angry with him that he hasn’t put anything aside for our 2 kids in savings for their future while he has the capability to do so and is being milked by the ex and adult kids. 

Hubbys excuse was our kids hadn’t started school but he said ok i get where you’re coming from and started few weeks ago putting money away

i feel for these kids because they didn’t ask for this mess, we’re the only people that are sane enough to be an example to these kids and its a slow hard mess to deal with.

Me and hubby agreed not to fall for the he said she said game and stick with facts but hubby doesn’t want to confront the girls with the facts for fear they’ll run off again and i totally get that. She robbed the girls of family and is the epitome of bat shit crazy... i’m not worried if the kids try to push dad back with their mum, it won’t happen 100% but hubby just doesn’t want to tell the girls he can’t give a shit about their mum so he chooses to be silent