Visitations
We have been having problems with my stepdaughter and mom because they are very toxic people. We had to put out foot down because sd was wrongly accusing us of abuse and other things. We decided to not allow her in our house but we still have 2 small step sons and they still deserve time with dad. Today is the day they are supposed to spend the weekend with dad and mom denies access. She won't let my husband see his children. Bio mom has done this so many times and has kept the kids from dad for 3 years at the time. In the begining, we had to ask other family members to go and get the kids so that my husband can see them. We are going to court again! This is too much! Why do bio mom think she is entitled to make this kind of decisions? She takes the money every month, she takes everything we buy for the kids, she took our apartment we rented for her, she took everything inside the apartment that we furnished, she takes, takes, takes and never give. I am so sick of this. For 16 years she has called all the shots. She abuses us, she disrespects me constantly, and she is not even responsible for those kids. They are completely alone the whole weekend and she wont even allow dad to see them?
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Of course she accepts
Of course she accepts everything she's given from your husband. That's how those BMs operate. And as long as the kids aren't with dad, she doesn't care where they are or what they do.
The court order says you have the boys this weekend? A lot of people have told me that you must do everything on your side to enforce visitation to prove to the court BM is in contempt ie. Tell BM you will pick kids up at X time, if she refuses, call the local police and ask them to enforce, etc. so you have proof in court.
we don't have anything by court in our state
The agreement was for every summer and every other christmas when they lived in PR. We have a verbal agreement for every other weekend because they live accross the street from us. She won't allow dad to spend time with them any other time. She is wicked!
I am a little confused-- how
I am a little confused-- how do you have "small step sons" if you have been dealing with this for 16 years?
The oldest is 16
My husband and I been married for 12 years. BM and hubby never been married. They lived together but when the oldest was born she gave the baby to her grandmother for weeks and my husband was not allowed to make decisions for her at all. The twins were conceived after a fight (makeup sex). After the twins were born my husband found her with another men and left her. We met when the twins were a year old. The twins are now almost 13 years old. Mom has kept kids away for most of their lives and when he do have access she controls everything.
Unless court order states and
Unless court order states and defines to comply with mothers demands, micro-manage when children are in his care....she has such power when it is given to her by him.
Tell her to buzz off it is the childrens time with their father...NOT moms time to tell dad what to do, when to do it, where to do it.
Hasnt your lawyer told dh that...?
I would move and NOT go back
I would move and NOT go back to court.
Give her what she wants and move on. It's a hell of a thing when a cp is like your BM. This behavior has become so common, so so common AND it will not end until courts remove cases like this from their authority. Cases churn and churn, and parents are not held accountable.
Anyway a patteren you may not have thought about is,when the oldest kid is sucked into this, it is only a matter of time the other silbings follow.
Be very careful !!