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she's outdone herself...the cow

tinky winky's picture

Submitted by tinky winky on Tue, 09/13/2011 - 7:11am

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I’m sick to my stomach. BM has sent my husband sms’s with details of things they used t do to one another and what she would still to do to him. I don’t know how to react to something like that. I confronted my DH abut the sms and he says he’s dealing with it. (Meaning, He’s ignoring her) I think that’s not enough. He needs to tell her where to get off. My SD is quite old and I feel she can keep in touch with her dad without BM’s intervention. She undermines and disrespects me. I don’t know why. Sad bit is that she’s married. Poor husband has no clue what his slut of a wife is doing behind his back. I’m afraid I’m gonna go psycho as well coz all I’m beginning to see in my hubby and her screwing each other. The message she sent him was so explicit and descriptive and has burned a bad picture in my memory. What should I do? I don’t want to confront her because I feel its DH’s responsibility to get rid of her since she’s his past not mine. How do I command respect without her thinking I’m insecure. I wish DH would see things my way. Imagine if It was him finding such a sms from my ex…because believe me we also had rough and hot sex, but because of the respect I have for him. I won’t allow my ex’s to send me such messages. O I Hate her. I hope this hatred doesn’t rub off on SD.

tinky winky's picture

Submitted by tinky winky on Tue, 09/13/2011 - 7:35am

He has replied.. only by asking her why she sends such things. I saw the 1st message by mistake. I was using his phone sending my sister an sms. when she replied I saw the heading of the message BM had sent so I read it. and boy was I disgusted. i wish I hadn't read it. this woman is turning me into something I'm not. I'm anxious at what she might have sent my DH again. every opportunity I get I read his sms's. I trust my DH but I don't trust her. they separated more that 10 years ago. she needs to let go.

Disneyfan's picture

Submitted by Disneyfan on Tue, 09/13/2011 - 7:48am

He didn't give her an ear full and demand she stop. He didn't delete the messages or change his number. All he did was ask her why. That sounds fishy.

Since he can't/won't put her in her place, you may have to.

stepsonhatesme's picture

Submitted by stepsonhatesme on Tue, 09/13/2011 - 7:56am

IMHO I would take his phone and sms her back, she will think that it is him, and tell her where to get off. Since it obviously seems like her wont. You said that he didnt delete the sms, that makes me wonder also. Does he re-read over and over agian, reliving it.If so, it sounds like he is wanting to do it again, OR he is just very very disturbed man.

tinky winky's picture

Submitted by tinky winky on Tue, 09/13/2011 - 8:27am

she won't care. She's fighting with her hubby now and wishes they break up so she can feast on mine.

Flutterby's picture

Submitted by Flutterby on Tue, 09/13/2011 - 8:50am

OOOh aaah, I would say that perhaps if he hasn't deleted it, then he's got nothing underhand to hide. If somehow in this problem causing electronic world, you had discovered it after it had been deleted, would that be worse?

It's certainly not pleasant (probably sickening with dread, actually). I have learnt in the past to go with my gut instinct: no proof, no rhyme, no reason, in the end my theory has proven to be right. Oh, wait,that's "Women's Intuition"!

You will only know by his body language, tone of voice etc that he is telling the truth one way or the other. Might I say though, if you're going to do this, once you make your intuitive mind up one way or the other, leave it that.

Maybe also ask him if does get anymore of these types of messages to let you know, see how he reacts. If he does get more, thank him for letting you know calmly (even though you're probably furious, but hey she's now making a complete fool of herself).

Cheers x