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Skids and pets: How to tell if your skid is a psychopath in the making

princessmofo's picture

About 5 weeks ago we adopted a beautiful boxer mix puppy from a shelter. My oldest biokid has high-functioning autism and his doctor thought this would be a nice way to help him socialize and come out of his shell. So I told my oldest this was something I was doing for him and that he would be instrumental in the care of the dog. And he has been wonderful and very responsible. Really impressing me with his ability. He and the dog have bonded beyond words. They roughhouse and play and are devoted to each other.
My stepbrat 6 is having a hard time dealing with the fact that the dog is not his. When he arrived for his days here after her inital arrival he exclaimed to his father, "Oh daddy! I'm so happy you bought a puppy for me!" To which my oldest replied, "No. She is not your dog. She is the family dog." The skidbrat became instantly jealous. And I could see the evil fibers beginning to twist in his head. (And let me just mention that he already has a dog at his BMs house so he is not foreign to the ways of pets)
My oldest is on the floor playing with the puppy. Tug of war. They are having a deligtful time. Biokid laughing in hysterics with joy. Stepbrat walks over and insinuates himself between dog and biokid and begins taking the palm of his hands and slapping the dog on the sides of her head, like he's clapping but with force. He does this three times in a row until dog takes paw (and they are big) and slaps him in his face with it. He then proceeds to run to his "daddy" and say the dog hurt him, while crying. *side note: I watched this whole thing happen firsthand* I walk up to DH and tell him that's not what happened. I then tell stepbrat he better leave MY dog alone. He's going to make her mean and when she chews your face off I'm not going to stop her. My DH of course sides with stepbrat saying he's just a little boy and wouldn't hurt an animal. The dog is being too rough.
Fastforward to yesterday. Same thing happens again. I watch stepbrat slapping my dog in the face. I'm watching him again. This time I walk over a spit the words at him, "Leave the dog alone. NO hitting her."
I'm really at a loss. I am not parting with this dog. My son loves her and needs her. But if the dog lashes out at that miserable little sh*t skid my DH will take his side. I'm taking the dogs side over skid and DH and then can pack up and move out. I've watched this kid push my oldest bioson until he couldn't take it anymore. My son has asked him to stop chasing him and he keeps at it, and pushes and pulls on my son's clothes. When my son retaliates and finally knocks him to the ground *again I'm watching all this* my DH tries to punish my son. Skid lies to my face about something that he broke, my biokid tells me what happened, and my DH says they both need to be punished because nobody came forward first and told the truth. They had to be asked. WTF?! Seriously! I hate to believe that a 6yo can be such a skilled manipulator with sociopathic tendencies but here we are. . .

Comments

imjustthemaid's picture

Well SD was 11 when she murdered her hamster. Then she was so mad that her hamster was dead that she murdered my daughters hamster. Then she tried to blame the entire thing on my niece that lives 200 miles away that had visited about 2 months prior to the murders! We ended up finding a cell phone video with her and her cousin torturing the poor thing.

Then DH got me a pug for Christmas. SD was way too rough with the little puppy. I used to hide the puppy from her because who knows what she would do. I caught her being mean a few times. Then the next year I got another pug for Christmas. Ugh! I love my puggies but to this day I still have to keep them away from her and she is 16 now!!

Thankfully DH always took my side when it came to the animals because he loves them too.

Then we found out about a year ago that SD murdered her friends hamster too!! Needless to say I never leave her alone with BD4 because she hates her!!

My puggies hate SD and they run when they see her coming. They never have accidents in the house, only when SD leaves her bedroom door open. THey love to poop on her bed!!

I would definitely moniter him with the poor little puppy!! He is going to cause the puppy to be aggressive if he keeps doing mean things to it. Eventually the puppy with be very territorial with his food and bones and probably end up biting him in the face. Luckily this didn't happen with me.

Queeny's picture

You have a major situation on your hands there!!! Your SD needs some serious therapy. Hurting and murdering animals is on the verge of hurting or murdering people!!!!!!!!!! Please get that child some therapy!

RedWingsFan's picture

SD14 was like this with my cat. All of her 4 guinea pigs have died within the past 2 yrs. She had to be told over and over again to just take care of them.

So, my cat would take off and hide anytime SD was around. I don't have that worry anymore since she's not coming around to our place anymore (DH visits her away from our apartment for a whole LOT of reasons).

My advice to you - NEVER leave him alone with the dog. He can do irreparable damage QUICK to a pup and he needs to be taught now that animal abuse is NOT acceptable and will NOT be tolerated, no matter what. SEVERE punishment needs to be handed down for ANY animal abuse. I am not saying beat the kid senseless, but definitely make him aware that you will not tolerate his misbehavior toward the pup. Swift and severe punishment and that should teach that little brat.

I wish I could slap the shit out of your DH. It's not about taking sides, it's about an animal's welfare. I wouldn't have a dog around that kid at all, period. I'd make him and DH leave if DH isn't going to punish the damn kid if he hurts an animal.

And yes, a 6 yr old can be a skilled manipulator. Easily. It's sick, but true. I've seen it before.

xtina's picture

It's not just about abusing the dog but what would happen to the biokid whose dog has tremendously helped him and brought him great joy? if your DH wants to take that away from him over his fucking nightmare child then they can both hit the street. It's not about taking the dogs side its about her son's side!

RedWingsFan's picture

^^^EXACTLY!! LOL

I don't usually tell people to hit their kids or whatever, but in this case, this may be how he learns. He boxes the dogs ears, you box his ears! Maybe once he can FEEL what he's doing, he won't like it and he'll stop.

Again, though, he needs to be TAUGHT that this isn't how animals are to be treated. Not only that, but he needs to be severely punished. EVERY TIME!

Lalena75's picture

Let him know the legal consequences for animal abuse, and the next time the little heathen is picking on the dog video tape it and ask your DH "do you want to do something or do I call the authorities for cruelty to animals"

tweetybird74's picture

I would say video tape it. DH's little animal abuser needs to learn not to do this to the dog, otherwise the dog will lash out and if authorities get involved they could just take the dog. Don't let the little animal abuser cause your son to lose his new best friend

sterlingsilver's picture

time to put a video camera of some sort into quiet (unseen action). If your phone has one act like you're playing games on it or texting but really be catching the whole senerio on camera, then play it for DH. Better have proff in case this dog deos do something to the kid and you need to show that the kid was the instigator. Also wanted to just say, what is happening btw your ss and bs AND even the puppy while you aren't watching, scary hey? Sheesh. As far as the lying goes, my ss15 was and is a big liar. I think it's so they won't get into trouble. My own kids know better then to lie to me b/c I will find out the truth sooner or later and when I do someone's going to pay! lol But I think bio kids know that and don't push mom to the limit where as skids seem to think it's ok to lie and we cannot discipline. (or at least I can't)

Good luck.

Anywho78's picture

You need to have a "Barney Style" talk with your DH! He should be aware that at SIX years old, his son is more than old enough to know what is and is not appropriate behavior when it comes to animals! Your DH is a dumb ass! Your SS is NOT a two year old, he's SIX & should, by this age, know what is okay & what is not!

I told my SO, very simply that if his kids EVER repeated offensive actions towards MY dogs that I would return the behavior in kind...if his kids kicked my dog, I'd kid the kid, if his kid slapped my dog, I'd slap the kid. He got the point & so did they. They learned quick & in a hurry that they are to respect my animals, their space & play with them appropriately. I'm not about to have to rehome a dog because the damn kids can't refrain from abusing him/her!

B22S22's picture

That kid is dispicable.

Coming from a long-time Boxer owner... that child will get his as the dog gets older, trust me. Boxers are FIERCELY protective of their "children" and obviously has determined YOUR SON is it's child. One of these days, you're going to see SS being ugly with your son, and your dog will calmly place him(her?)self between the two of them and glare at your SS.

Oh, and we couldn't even play around "smacking" each other with any of our boxers. Especially if I was wrestling around with my youngest, they would have a FIT trying to protect him.

So even though your dog is a boxer mix, it will probably carry a lot of those characteristics. But I agree with others, you need to start videotaping. Our full-grown boxer could run and push my 225 lb DH down he was so strong so imagine what could happen with a kid.

boogeymom's picture

ABSOLUTELY!!! Boxers are called Boxers because that's what they do. Box. And they WILL protect their people fiercely. If that dog thinks SS will harm his (your) child, he'll separate them with his body first, but then who knows what will happen and dogs are ALWAYS the ones who suffer the consequences even when it's the PERSON'S fault.

boogeymom's picture

I think the best thing to do is to video the whole thing for a few reasons. One is so that DH can see EXACTLY what happened, thus proving his kid is lying to him and there will be irrefutable evidence of this. Secondly, if DH wants to do the "boys will be boys" thing, you can say you'll take the video to the authorities if he doesn't stop it. Thirdly, if DH decides to discipline his child for a) lying to him, and b) doing that to the dog in the first place, SS will learn that if he does it again, you'll have the video camera out ready to capture it. Hopefully this will make SS stop his behavior, if for nothing else than to avoid getting into trouble, the icing on the cake being that the dog isn't being beaten up anymore. It would be such a shame to separate a boy and his dog because of someone else's brat child being attacked by a highly provoked dog if God forbid it should come to that.