It never ends. Anyone else living with their skid(s)?

Finally got SS5 feeling up to par after coming home sick from Gran's. Of course the first thing he wants to do is play with DD8 and my ten year old little brother (man that's a pain to type out - I'm lazy- let's say LB from now on). Playing board games, he starts losing so he decides to tip the board. Time out for that. Sat and explained that if you don;t play nice and by the rules, people wont want to play with you. An hour later, it was trampoline time...

This was the source of the massive issue less than a week ago. Yet I let him go out and play with the older kids. Heck, I even let him play the same GAME that got him in trouble last time. This time he didn't threaten anyone. So, he waited until the part of the game where you have to sit down, and decided to tackle the other children. Knees first...to their faces. I ran the situation by DH (as we're still having issues coming to common ground on the discipline end of parenting) and he suggested having him play in his room for ten minutes. Really, ten minutes of dvd player, gameboy, ipad, legos, remote control car, etc?

I'm so confused as to how I deal with this new violent tendency. DD8 never did this growing up. LB10 is a huge WWE fan, and has pulled stunts like this in the past with our dad, but not around DD8 or SS5. It's hard enough dealing with SS5 on a regular basis. LB10 thinks he's 10 going on 30, but acts like an overly emotional three year old (cries every time he is reprimanded, tells outrageous stories, lies constantly. My dad does NOTHING with him). I'm pulling my hair out.

I know they say that girls are the drama queens but seriously? These boys are going to be the death of me. And by "boys" I mean all THREE of them; LB10, SS5, and DH. How in the world does everyone else deal with living in the same house as their skid(s) aqnd the difference in parenting between SO and themselves?

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^^^ This. this is exactly how

^^^ This. this is exactly how I feel on weeks like this last one.

I drink some. It makes

I drink some. It makes things more bearable. I plan activies out of the house. Either with just dh or with my kids-no ss14 included.

I've sort of taken things into my own hands. Now if it is something like grades and such I dont really say anything to ss-I might mention to dh that saw ss's grades today looks like he's flunking. But that's about all I say. Now however, if it involves me in anyway-like my household, my kids, or some sort of direct insult to me I dont even bother to go to dh much of the time. I handle it myself in a variety of manners. If you think about it-you have to realize YOU have a lot of power in the home. Do you cook for ss? Stop making his favorite meals. Make things that are healthful but you know he doesnt like. Do you drive him to an extracurricular? Oops next time it's time to go you just might not be able to make it. If I find ss's clothes, belongings outside, "oops you must not want those since you left it lying in the yard-I'll just throw it in the trash for you"

My ss14 knows exactly what I am doing He knows when I tell him no it's because he is so rude to me. I've point blank explained to him that that's the way it's going to work. With your ss5-you'd definitely need to get it down to his level. but sometimes I find actions speak far louder than words and I dont even need to raise my voice for ss14 to hear me.

I think I've gone one time to

I think I've gone one time to do something outside of the house with just DD8. DH was not appreciative. He expects me to be mom for SS5. I understand that. BM pops in and out a couple of times a year, but that's it. And I do love SS5 tons. He just drives me to drink (mmmm booze) and pull my hair out a lot of the time. Doing things without him, especially as a stay at home mom, would not bode well for anyone in my particular situation.

That being said, I think that taking things to his level and demonstrating that I WONT be taking his crap, that there are real life consequences for things, is a wonderful idea. Perhaps the next time he decides to not play nice, I wont hold my temper and explain anymore. Instead it'll be "if you aren't being nice, I don't want to play with you and neither do the big kids". Perhaps not being the center of attention will get through.

My ss14's bm is not really

My ss14's bm is not really involved either-she chooses to only see him 3 or 4 times a year simply because she doesnt wish to spend more time with him than that. But those are the breaks. Just because bm is lousy doesnt mean I'm gonna take over all those mom type duties. If dh and I werent married I guess he'd be doing it all on his own anyway.

You are certainly entitled to one on one time with your child, days out with your girlfriends, or window shopping at the mall all by yourself if you so choose. You need to set that boundary with your dh asap. If you dont he will continue to think that you are supposed to be his child's mother.

I think it might be especially easy in your case to suggest that your ss needs some one on one time with dear old dad and that you and your dd need girl time to do all those "girly" things that we like to do.