You are here

New mother/son activity: SS 14 and BM-from-hell lie to DH together now???

stepto3's picture

Submitted by stepto3 on Fri, 08/05/2011 - 1:44pm

SS14 and BM have now taken to being dishonest to DH TOGETHER. How can we help SS14 turn into a decent honest person when BM encourages this a-hole behavior just because she still LOVES to get under DH's skin???
Funny, they'll treat him like a fool but they still want child support and toys, movies, food, school supplies, etc etc etc.... :sick:
Any ideas ladies?? I'm having a hard time walking that tricky stepmom line but still standing up for what's right without being "the bitch". *insert eyeroll here*

Comments

BSgoinon's picture

Submitted by BSgoinon on Fri, 08/05/2011 - 2:03pm

Ugh... I fear this. BM has already (at age Dirol told SS to tell us things that aren't true "we were late for school because I had the poopies". Ok, this kid has NEVER said "poopies" Ever. And we know that she was hung over from her partying the night before because she posted it on FB. Duh... So SS (for now) knows that we can tell when he is lying. But I fear for when he becomes a teenager, what stories they will concoct together. She will likely allow him to smoke (weed) in her house because SHE does... and they will be little party buddies. I would love to hear the answer to this question so we can be proactive in our action plan. Wink

stepto3's picture

Submitted by stepto3 on Fri, 08/05/2011 - 2:08pm

I know, right?? Stay tuned...
Heart to hearts have worked in the past but teens are a WHOLE other story Sad

stepto3's picture

Submitted by stepto3 on Fri, 08/05/2011 - 2:10pm

I like it...I wonder if they have to deal with each other 24/7 if their love affair will end as quickly as it started? I think so....
P.S "Go git me sumfin to beatcha wid". is a riot, I may take this angle from now on Smile
.

BettyRay's picture

Submitted by BettyRay on Fri, 08/05/2011 - 2:15pm

DH and I are dealing with the same thing. I really don't have any good answers for you. DH confronts BM about the lies but she's always got an excuse. SS14 has figured out BM is a total disneyland-mom. DH is so frustrated he's ready to throw in the towel.

DH has talked to SS14 about the lies and how families shouldn't keep secrets from each other...But SS is 14 at that age it's in one ear and out the other.

BM was totally against violent video games. Now she has let him get the Call of Duty and Modern Warfare, we found out because SS9 told us. It was BM and SS14's "secret". SS14 was only going to play them when SS9 wasn't around -that was their agreement.

This has now progressed to SS14 getting an XBox and gaming online at BM's house. To make matters worse SS9 is now playing these games and gaming online as well.

It's so frustrating. We just keep maintaining our rules at our house no online gaming and no violent video games. But the kids don't want to be here because of it.

I wish I could offer you better advice.

~BettyRay

LizzieA's picture

Submitted by LizzieA on Fri, 08/05/2011 - 8:42pm

Gosh, our BM lied about so much...it started when she and both kids started smoking. They were 13 and 17. All three kept it from big bad Daddy. She is a big kid too and has entered her second childhood.

Then when they were divorced, she lied about:
1. SS getting arrested for pot (DH found out when calling court about another case SS had)
2.The school filing child in need of services for truancy
3. SS flunking 8th grade...again
4. SD went off BC and bingo...knocked up!

etc. and so on...it was so bad for those kids. They both went to hell in a handbasket thanks to non-parent who also taught them not to respect DH...their relationship with him is finally healing...now they've both put themselves into the gutter, they realize that hey, Dad was right...