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Please help,my mother/father in law grandparent only to their "real" grandchildren!

evilstepmomof2's picture

Submitted by evilstepmomof2 on Sun, 01/16/2011 - 6:49am

My husband is the biggest dick I know sometimes!!!! He has two spoiled little shits and I have three goodhearted children. For Christmas, my family who truth be told are not rich but hardworking people and his hoity toity rich shitheads! Sorry Im venting, bear thru the curse words but I have to get this out!! Ok so this was the first xmas that I finally put my foot down and we went to my parents, As we were leaving for my moms his Mother shows up and invites us WITH TWO DAYS SHORT NOTICE AFTER KNOWING OUR PLANS to XMAS night dinner. I told her that I was sorry but we had yet to visit my side of the family over the past FIVE YEARS and my mothers last doctors report said that ultimatly this could be the last holiday we would be able to have with her! WITH TEARS IN THAT BITCHES EYES SHE AGREED ON DOING THE DINNER THING AT A LATER TIME! WHAT A SELFISH MANIPULATIVE COLD-HEARTED BITCH!!!, God love MY PARENS, When we arrived they gave to each child equally they got them all the major xmas gift they wanted! Also my Mom and Dad got them a new coat a peice, five kids is tough when your husband has been looking for a job for two years instead of getting one! Ok so my sister also gets all five kids the same she got my 9yr old and my 10yr old stepdaughter makeup and my twins age 6 and my younger stepdaughter age six as well equal gifts. We go home and had gotten mannnnnny packages the first was from his Brother and his wife they are truely decent people they gave all equally as well as going to the trouble to get my husband and I a gift. Then we open the packages from his Biological father and Snooty stepmother needless to say all the kids got gifts but there were extra for their biological grandkids, mine got $5 worth of coloring book and a cheap box of crayons and a cheap outfit whilst my stepdaughters enjoyed a $40 toy and two really nice expensive outfits a peice! I know its not the gift that counts its the thought but DAMN! the thought I had was it would have been better if theyd saved the damn money and shoved it.... I digress, Ok then I go to pick up my daughter who was coming back from the holidays from her dads and My husband CLAIMS he is sick and needs to stay home, sneaks off to his MOTHERS AND STEPFATHERS!!! Who LAVISHLY GIVES GIFTS AND SOOO MANY NEW EXPENSIVE OUTFITS BUT ONLY MY TWO STEPDAUGHTERS, THEY EVEN GIVE HIM A GIFT CARD!! My daughters just got finished being made to divy up their clothes because these two stinking brats are the same size and love trashing and tearing up their clothes!!! So prancing around in their new duds, telling mine how great their clothes are, showing their asses because mine who share willingly didnt get anything! The youngest SD even wanted to model all her clothes for me and I told her that that was not nice because it was rubbing it in to mines faces. I finally had it! So I told him that if he doesnt say something to that BITCH and THAT POMPAS ASS then I AM DONE!! What kind of people do this!!!! to babys!!! ON CHRISTMAS!!!! I WILL NEVVVVER GO TO THEIR HOME NOR ARE THEY COMING TO MINE!! SHE STOOD IN MY DAMN LIVING ROOM AND TOLD MY KIDS AS WELL AS MY STEPDAUGHTERS THEY ALL HAD GIFTS! WELL GUESS WHAT I GOT A GIFT FOR HER, ITS CALLED LEARN SOME DANG CLASS LADY!!!!!! Any ideas and comments to help will be very welcome!!

Comments

Most Evil's picture

Submitted by Most Evil on Sun, 01/16/2011 - 7:52am

Definitely wrong of them to do. I would never go around them again, and tell them why if they ask!!

I am glad you told the ones who did get the gifts, not to rub it in.

ownpersonalopinion1's picture

Submitted by ownpersonalopinion1 on Sun, 01/16/2011 - 8:42am

Granny knew this would hurt the children's feelings. Granny knew she would cause hard feelings between you and your husband. Granny knew exactly what she was doing. She crossed the line. There is no excuse of for hurting children's feelings on purpose.

I would exclude her from any event that involved my family. Or you can call her hand on it and tell ask her what she was thinking!

NewBeginning's picture

Submitted by NewBeginning on Sun, 01/16/2011 - 9:36am

Me?

I'd ream my DH a new ass for about a week..make it very hard for him to sit down. How dare he sneak off that way - sounds like a plan was worked out and you were never involved in it whatsoever. If he has any respect for you and your kids, he'll tell that piece of shit he has for a mother how it is. Seriously!!

What was his reactions as his kids were parading around their new gifts? I would hope complete embarrassment...and nothing more. If he so much as grinned over what all his kids got while mine got nothing I'd make sure he never smiled again.

This bitch KNEW she was causing a problem..no doubt. And doesn't seem to care. I'd make it where she never walked across my doorstep again. If your DH wants to see her, he can do that on his own time.

Your DH being out of work should be a reminder to him that this kind of shit is NOT fair...

Unreal....

Kay2's picture

Submitted by Kay2 on Sun, 01/16/2011 - 10:12am

I agree with Snarky, if MIL wont be fair, then MAKE it fair. Either they share the gifts that they got, or get rid of them.

Personally I think I would pack up every single gift from MIL and storm over to her house, throw the crap at her and tell her if she can't be fair the keep her shit!

Marie0124's picture

Submitted by Marie0124 on Sun, 01/16/2011 - 10:17am

Knowing my mom it will be very hard for her not to treat her bio grandchild different than my skids. It would be just as hard as it is for stepmoms to treat skids the same as their own chd. I think DH needs to make this very clear to his mother. It is not acceptable to do more for some kids than others

Anon2009's picture

Submitted by Anon2009 on Sun, 01/16/2011 - 1:09pm

I agree. When my mom & stepdad got married, his parents always bought me stuff for Xmas and my birthday. I knew they cared about me, but they loved my stepsiblings more. I was fine with that.

I'm sorry about your mom Sad my (((HUGS))) & prayers go out to you.

WickedStepMom18's picture

Submitted by WickedStepMom18 on Sun, 01/16/2011 - 2:22pm

Sometimes people can't help themselves. It's classless. My parents don't recognize my SS11 at all. He calls me his "real" mom and they have never once asked about him... given him anything for his birthday, Christmas. It's as if he doesn't exist.

I understand how you are feeling. The only solution I can offer is, take it for what it is. It is simply a demonstration of the kind of people they are. Remember - your children are sweet and goodhearted because of you. So, perhaps do a little something special for them ONLY next time. It doesn't have to be broadcasted so as to upset the step-brats but make your munchkins know just what a lucky mother you are because of them. Kids are so resilient. Honestly, it probably bothers you more than them. Remember - you raised them to be goodhearted. Wink

sixteensmom's picture

Submitted by sixteensmom on Sun, 01/16/2011 - 8:16pm

It's the opposite at my house. Because my skids have made my life hell the past eight years, and my mother and sister have been there with the tissues and tequila on occasion, they have no regard for skids whatsoever. They did send graduation and wedding gifts... Never got a thank you. But they do not buy Christmas or birthday gifts for skids. Skids don't go to my moms for the holidays either and have never sent a card or Christmas gift or any other acknowledgement.

On the other hand, my in laws consider my children their grand children. They delight in telling the family that when asked, they say they have eight wonderful grandkids and they dont differentiate with "steps" My kids spend more time with dh parents than their own grandkids do, they always send thank you and get well cards and take off from work least one day whenever they come to visit... And that's a lot of money for a college student. They play cards and take FIL out fishing and dd takes MIL shopping. Their girlfriends and boyfriends come too. They are happy to meet them, have conversations and hang out.

Dh parents used to give his kids $50 each for bdays and Christmas. Now they get $25 and my three get the other $25. I have tried everything I can think of to get them not to do it but they say they're old people who know what they're doing and they love my kids and let them do what they want. Ok then. Lol.

Question for op.... Didn't your kids get gifts from their dad and his family that skids didn't get? I also agree that they should have to share of your kids shre with them.

ddakan's picture

Submitted by ddakan on Mon, 01/17/2011 - 12:37am

I would not expect anything that that bitchy lady and I would NEVER go to her house again. I'm not saying she should buy equally for all kids, because we don't allow that in my family. I won't allow my family to buy for my skids because I know they are selfish brats from hell. It's wonderful that your parents are very generous. With the shortage of money and our parents being retired, we don't want to stress their budget. We absolutely insisted NO GIFTS FOR EVERYONES KIDS because it was too hard on them. (We have 7 total).

Keep the skids away from the bitchy greedy people. Don't make your kids share if the skids don't have to. They can learn that they come from different families and get different gifts. If you keep going back...you will get the same treatment.

I wish your mother good health Smile By the way...share the clothes the sd got as a gift. It is only FAIR. Your kids can "share" their crayons in exchange :/