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Can't Take much longer

Ambz13's picture

Submitted by Ambz13 on Fri, 01/14/2011 - 4:33pm

First I would like to say I am new to this sit. didn't know there was anything like this out there.

I have stuff to get off my chest. I have a 6 year old step daughter who is a really bad kid. my husband and I have been taking her to behavior classes. but they havn't help her out. she steals, lies, mean to other kids. I have a 3 year old niece who she pushes down, hits. does not listen to anyone. not her teachers or us or grandparents. she does what ever she wants to do. my husband and I just had a baby 10 weeks ago this is my first child. i have never in my life seen a kis act like how she does. she will go through all of our stuff. and if she gets cought she says i did it cuz i wanted to. we have done every thing under the sun to try and fix the problem. I can honesty say i really dislike this child. she is a problem child from hell. I don't believe that a demion could take over someone. but i sometimes think one has came over her. The doctors said she is adhd, i always thought that that was a fake thing. but i do think she has it. she talks allday everyday, does not sleep, can't sit still. everyday at school she gets introuble, for talking or not listening, being mean to oher kids & stealing from the teachers and classmates. I don't know what to go anymore. I can't go 12 more years like this. my husband dont know what to do sometimes i think he doesn't like her too. its sad to say it but its hard she knows right from wrong. Right before christmas we told her she will not have a christmas. and santa can see everything you are doing. she was good for 3 weeks! and on christmas day after she got her gifts she was so bad. back to the same stuff. at 6 she has put poop on the walls, gets in our room takes stuff. she eats off from attention she wants to do what ever she wants. next step milatery school. and im to the point where i am going to have a officer come and talk to her. we have tryed everything and i mean everything. i can't leave her and the baby in the same room together im scared she will hurt him. oh and by the way she bio mother has not been in her life since she was 2. she don't remember her. she thinks I am her mother. any one out there know what i can do? i look at her and it makes me sick and that is sad.

Comments

ddakan's picture

Submitted by ddakan on Fri, 01/14/2011 - 5:03pm

Wow, that is sad. Put her on some adhd meds and get her calmed down and see if there is a change in her behavior. You don't want it to get to the point where she gets expelled, then you'll have to deal with her ALL day.

Keep the baby safe from her like you do and take her to a pediatrician for the behavior. Maybe its her brain chemicals been screwed up? Sorry I can't help more.

It could be genetic garbage from BM. BM is out of the picture and that is weird in itself, so BM must have a problem of some type, usually mothers don't just leave their 2 year olds. Maybe she was like this as a baby too.

Ambz13's picture

Submitted by Ambz13 on Fri, 01/14/2011 - 5:12pm

yeah i was think the the same thing about genetic. yeah the bm crazy too from what i have heard. i couldnt believe a mother would just walk out of her kids lifes. i guess the bm had another child and gave that kid up too. I just uderstand she knows right from wrong and i know she knows how to be good I dont know why she just dont do it. yeah they did put her on meds "strattera". i didnt want to but something needed to be done. thank you for your comments it helps to vent.

Rags's picture

Submitted by Rags on Fri, 01/14/2011 - 5:20pm

She is about 8yrs too young for military school. We sent my SS when he was 16 for his Jr year of HS but most schools will take freshman.

There are a few schools left that will take 6th or 7th grade students but not many.

My SS did great until his BioDad poluted his mind with all-night on-line video game sessions.

It does sound to me that you need to get her to a Doc, on some meds, in to therapy and implement a structured discipline program for her.

Good luck

Ambz13's picture

Submitted by Ambz13 on Fri, 01/14/2011 - 5:28pm

we have did start the meds she has been on them for 4 days now, they said it will take 4 to 6 weeks to start working. she is going to therapy and discipline programs. and has been for 3 months it dont seem like it is helping.

jenstep's picture

Submitted by jenstep on Fri, 01/14/2011 - 6:29pm

My SS10 was a "problem child." Not the same kind of problems as yours, but he was diagnosed ADHD and was very disruptive in class, could not control himself and often hurt his sister (DD now 6). I too was afraid to leave him in the same room as my DD. He wouldn't hurt her on purpose, but every time it would just happen. He'd been to counseling on a regular basis and there didn't seem to be much change. This last summer we put him in a program for at-risk youth and it finally clicked for him. They taught him strategies to help him cope with his difficulties. After attending this day camp for the whole summer he was a different kid. He started school this year and his teacher said that he saw no signs of ADHD and my SS ended being on the A/B honor roll for the 1st time. He'd been a D/F student all his life. And all this was done w/o medications. (Not that I'm anti-meds.)

There is hope. Things can get better. I think for my SS it was a combination of becoming more mature, the right counselors, the desire to change, and the absence of his BM for a long period. I'd stick with the therapy and the meds for another 3 months and if you still don't see any results, it might be time to find other programs. Good luck to you.

Ambz13's picture

Submitted by Ambz13 on Fri, 01/14/2011 - 6:47pm

thank you. h and I have been trying things for a while to help sd. i hope it gets better. or she will be really messed up when she gets older (like jail). and she is so smart she is in 1st grade and is reading spelling and math on a 3rd grade level. just her behavior is what messes her up.

Missing_Me's picture

Submitted by Missing_Me on Fri, 01/14/2011 - 8:51pm

I am sorry that your family is going through this. My SS8 and DD8 are also ADHD and before we did medication I tried everything! Diet changes, sleep changes, therapy, The list could go on and on. With my DD8 she struggled in school, she is now in third grade and a straight A student. My SS8 had to be put in a partial hospitalization program. It was a program for 6 hours of therapy a day, in learned coping skills and RESPECT. He is now a different child. Day and night! They are both still on medication, but I didn't want them struggling through school and not getting the education they deserve. I wish I could give you more advise, but PATIENTS, PATIENTS and more PATIENTS!!

Good luck, I will keep you in my prayers, the only thing that kept me going through all of this with my SS was the love of my husband and for a child who was abused, neglected and abandoned by BM