My wife still has the wedding ring from her first marriage. it is a very nice ring and she says that it was expensive, big rock and all. She said that she has always kept "in case of hard times" she could pawn it. She said that she paid half for it when they got married so it's not like he went out of his way like most men should. It bothered me at first but she keeps it put away and I don't think about it anymore. Maybe you could insist that he puts it away. Some people are just packrats, they hang onto everything.

The relationship thing. . .that's a little wierd, I think I would be upset too. Possibly they split on "good terms?" Sometimes you realize it just isn't working, and you don't love each other. The parents, I have a divorced aunt and uncle. He still visits and has a very good relationship with the family. We all call him "uncle" and he claims us as family and calls/ visits his "in laws" regularly.

Focus on the fact that you are about to be his wife. If he has a good opinion of her and your marrying him,they have both agreed that it is not going to work between them

S_cherry, I honestly don't think that is acceptable. A ring (especially a man's one) is a material object that should not be important unless you have a strong feeling attached to that. It seems like he does not want to let go those "memories", which is pretty disturbing because you are his soon-to-be wife now, and if I were you, I would be very offended...

DH and BM were never married, but were engaged, he gave her a ring, that (he says) wasn't anything special at all and he didn't spend much money on it. When they split, BM said that she was going to give the ring to SD. I think is inappropriate because SD was 2 when they split, she has no memory of such, and also, the relationship clearly didn't work, why would you want to give that to your child? Well, she gave SD6 the ring like a month or two ago, and SD claims that she "lost it under her bed", whatever, all I said to DH is that if she ever brings that ring here, it will disappear.

The bad thing is how things occurred too. One night I was talking about the issue with DH, and the very next morning, SD sais "i have a ring like that one" pointing at my wedding and engagement rings. And I felt my blood starting to boil, I asked, "who gave it to you", and she said, "my mommy". I wanted to EXPLODE!!!

I'd tell him to have his parents or other trusted adult hang on to the ring for his kids if he doesn't feel they are mature enough to have it, it shouldn't be held at your house

Hmm. This is a strange one. It is actually really nice the way they get a long…BUT, I would not like it one bit if my DH was that way about his ex.

I would say you do not have a leg to stand on, if he has always been this way. He may have to curb it a little bit when you get married, but you are going to been seen as trying to change him and his nice comfy life. (Buying her presents would get on my last nerve.)

I don’t think I would get into a relationship with someone like that. It is almost like he is still married to her. GOOD LUCK!

I would be bothered by this too.

If he wants to keep it for the kids then fine, store it in with the other memories (like pics) in storage. It should not be out in the open, it is very disrespectful to you.

I understand him not getting rid of it. My DH has old pics and things for SD when she turns 18. BM and him were never married but he has somethings....we keep them in a large box in storage. I am ok with that, it is not in my face everyday.

In my mind it is a reminder of his past MARRIAGE, why does he need to be reminded of that daily??? He doesn't--so put it in storage for the kids!

I had my wedding ring from my first marriage made in to a different ring. After the divorce the ring had no meaning other than it was gold. So I had it changed from a symbol of all things evil and complete failure in to something meaningful to me.

Best regards,