BM has woken the Beast
As much as I hate BM, I can honestly say that I have never done something just to fuck with her but she has REALLY pissed me off this time!
SS's birthday is Saturday and despite it being our time with him, she is keeping him. I had told DH to ask her if she wanted to keep him Saturday (I figured she would want to have some kind of party for him) and DH would get him Sunday. I specifically asked that we not do a pick up later Saturday. A few months ago BM had a party on Saturday (we usually pick him up at 2:00 PM) and she asked if we could pick him up at 8:00 because it was a kid party and she wanted to take him blah blah blah. Well SS had been talking about it and he was pretty excited so we said yes. Well lo and behold, around 5:00 she texts DH and says, "Come pick up SS." DH and I had gone out because we weren't planning to pick SS up til later. He texts her and says, "I am not in town and I will come at 8:00 like we agreed." She says, "Come now or you wont get him." At this point I tell DH it isn't worth the fight and we should just go get him so he tells her he will be there within an hour. We get back in town and go pick up SS but no one is home. DH calls texts and no response. She finally texts him at 8:00 and says we can come pick him up from the party. Well I told DH I wasn't going to do that again this weekend, wait around for her to give us permission to come get him and then have her throw a little fit if we weren't willing to jump right into action. DH agreed and told BM we would come get him Sunday morning if she wanted to keep him Saturday for his party. She said," No, if you don't get him Saturday when I text you I am keeping him all weekend." Honestly, I knew she would pull something like this so I had already planned his birthday party for the next weekend and had made plans for DH and I this weekend. I am sure she thinks she really got to us but I am super excited to have this weekend for hubby and myself ALONE 
Anyway, SS had a Dr.s appointment Friday but I guess BM wanted to start the party on Friday so she asked DH to change the doctor's appointment. This is the woman who cannot call the doctor herself even though SS is puking his stomach out. So DH tells her that if she can't make it to the appointment she should call and change it. She whines about it and tells him to do it but finally says, "Whatever, OK." Lo and behold, it is Thursday night and the receptionist calls DH to confirm the appointment for tomorrow. All day DH had been telling me he wanted to call and change the appointment because he knew she wouldn't change it and he didn't want the dr to be waiting for them since theirs was the last appointment of the day. I also knew she wouldn't do it, but I also knew that she wanted DH to change the appointment, basically do what she says like always. He is always picking up her slack and she knows it so she likes to make these little power plays whenever she can. So DH changes the appointment to his convenience and texts BM and tells her, "The receptionist called me to confirm the appointment for tomorrow and since you didn't change it I made it for next Thursday at 5:00." Her response: "hahaha." I am FUMING.
Then, about two hours later, FIL calls DH to tell him BM hadn't changed the appointment. DH says he knows but how does FIL know? Well FIL called SS on his cell and BM told SS he wanted to speak to his grandfather. FIL asks what's up and she says, "Please tell DH I didn't change the appointment." DH says, "Yeah dad I know, I already texted her about the new appointment." Every since FIL stopped speaking to BM and her family they have been looking for any reason to talk to him, to try to get him back because he always gave them money. A few weeks ago BM's mother called FIL telling him SS had a bunch of car keys and could he come over and make sure they weren't his because they didn't know where SS got them from. Did they call and ask DH if they were his keys? No. When DH went to get him later that day he asked to see the keys and they had magically disappeared. SS said he knew where they were so DH said he wanted to take them to FIL to see if they were his. BM's mom protested and said couldn't FIL come look at them later and DH said no. Well she finally gives them to DH and no more than 10 mins later he gets a text from BM, "I forgot they were my keys." Yesterday, SS called FIL to ask if he would buy candy for his party and then BM took the phone from him and said, "Don't worry FIL, my husband will get SS everything he needs."
I am so sick of her shit, I really am. I can't stand it anymore. I know I am being vindictive and vile and I don't give a shit anymore. BM has pushed my buttons one too many times. This high road is giving me a nose bleed and I am thinking of coming down to her level. And she has NO idea who she is messing with }:)
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I would start documenting
I would start documenting these games in case it gets out of hand and she starts purposely playing MORE games to keep SS away. If she can't even call the doc by herself - she doesn't even have the right to have this kid. WHAT is wrong with people? I can only imagine what she pulls in the future if she is this petty right now...
Yup. DH always saves texts
Yup. DH always saves texts but some of these conversations happen face to face or on the phone so we can't really document it other than in an agenda. I can't count the number of times BM has handed over SS with a fever or severe allergies because she is too lazy and cheap to go to the dr or make an appt herself. Too many times DH has gone to pick up SS and when he asks about medicine SS is supposed to be taking she says it ran out that morning. Really? EVERY time? I always tell DH, if you think THIS is bad, wait till we have kids! Or she does...ugh, the horror!!!! :sick:
The CO says we have him every
The CO says we have him every weekend, regardless of birthday's or special occassions. However, if we show up to pick him up, BM won't hand him over and if SS is having a party SS won't want to leave and do we really want to show up to a 5 year old's birthday party w cops to enforce the CO? I can see it now, a hysterical BM and a crying SS being dragged away from his party and friends. Really doesn't seem like a viable option.
Our BM was a Jedi Master in
Our BM was a Jedi Master in game playing like this. She would NEVER tell us when something was arranged for ss on weekend's until the very last moment and then she would refuse to hand ss over if DH didnt agree to her terms. Since we only were permitted to have ss on a friday night, BM decided this, it really interfered with our lives on a weekly basis.
Examples like: DH P/U ss friday at 5pm (after work), she informs him that she wants ss returned to her at 10am the next morning as its his sister's birthday party. Stating " WE are a PROPER family so you and your wife (said with venom btw) should go around us". We already had plans but ss was so hyped and it was his sister's birthday, so we had little choice. To top this off BM TELLS DH he is to go get ss's hair cut before he returns him. Baring in mind in the UK business hours of hairdressers/barbers are 9am-5pm, since they were closed that evening by the time he P/U ss BM expected DH to get up and then immediately take ss first thing and then drive him to his house all in an hour!!! Thus ensuring DH couldnt spend much time at all with ss, as his bedtime was 7pm and he usually got up about 8amish. DH wasnt able to obviously do this, so she stopped him from seeing and speaking to ss for SIX weeks.
She still maintains to this day, she has never once stopped DH from seeing ss... :jawdrop:
This was a drop in the ocean to the BS stuff she would do, and there was *something* every weekend. This woman is MARRIED with another kid, you think she would have moved on from her full time hate campaign, but nooooo I guess psycho's don't get that mental memo.
So my DH decided to approach her with respect to ask that she tell us at least a week in advance, if possible, what ss's commitments were so we would be able to accommodate them as we didnt want him missing out, but neither did we want our weekends to completely revolve around BM's whims. She went mental, stating she does exactly this and what a shit father he is. Yeah, so much so that he had me dancing to BM's demands every effing weekend! Then her DH seeing BM upset, attacked my DH and had him up against the wall.
You cant reason with lunatics and am glad your DH's family are in the loyal camp and dont bother with BM. I hope your DH keyed FIL in on BM's recent games and attempts to re-engage with them by yanking on DH and FIL's chains? I think these situations I wouldnt hide it as I would want to ruin BM's worming her way back in!
Do we have the same BM? LOL I
Do we have the same BM? LOL
I always ask DH to tell FIL about these little games. When SS was born DH was living in a different city and the only way for FIL to see SS was to deal w BM and her family and to give them money. She got at least $100 everytime FIL would go get SS from her which was at least 5 times a week, on top of CS. Once DH moves back to town BM wouldn't even let him see SS unless FIL called to make the arrangements and did the drop-off and pick-up himself. BM and her family had gotten so used to FIL and DH doing everything for them it was INSANE. It took 3 yrs for FIL to finally cut all ties with them and things have gotten soooo much better. It's like he finally opened his eyes to all their games and there is no way he is going back.