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Boyfriend and his Daughter

VioletLightandLove's picture

My boyfriend of 16 months recently moved into my apartment. He has a 9 year old daughter who he has every other weekend. I am struggling with the way they interact. She calls him dada or papa bear every time she speaks to him. He babies her,  and says  shes just hungry when she is having a tantrum at age 9. 

Hoping to connect with women in similar situations. 

Comments

SteppedOut's picture

Just a warning... it likely will not get better. And. You will be more and more annoyed by her and she ramps up her attention getting behavior. 

VioletLightandLove's picture

That is a good word choice.  I do seem to be annoyed or uncomfortable. The 13 year old son also still says mama. Probably heard mama 20 times just at the dinner table alone last night. 

advice.only2's picture

He babies her and dismisses her tantrums...he is the problem...he is a Disney Dad!!  Disengage and have him find his own place to live.  Trust me we are saving you years and years of agony.

ntm's picture

This. If I had it to do over again, I wouldn't and if I did, it would be separate housing. Wait until puberty and the teen years, if you think it's bad now. 

thinkthrice's picture

The term "mini wife"

VioletLightandLove's picture

He actually calls her girlfriend!

CLove's picture

Emotional incest. 

Give this one a 30-day notice to live elsewhere.

justmakingthebest's picture

Bad

That is really gross. There are parenting differences you can live with but there are things that you need to make a line in the sand over. Your BF's daughter sees herself as your equal and he is not stopping it- even actively encouraging her to be at the forefront of your relationship. This is deal breaker stuff to me. He won't change, this is who he is. When people show you who they are- believe them.