Well, you know once you set boundaries, you will be tested. Saturday H had his 6 yrold D over for her bday and was taking her to a kids show. He wanted me to not go to church Sunday so that I could stay with SS. (He didn't want me to take his S with me because their faith is Jeh.Wit. even though they don't practice it faithfully.

My answer to H was "No, he doesn't listen to me and church is really important to me." We got into a big disagreement and he yelled "the next time your son wants to go somewhere with me I'm going to tell him, no". I said, "you know my son listens to you so that's completely different, but if you want to do that, then fine." He stormed out to pick up his D.

Of course I felt bad because I'm a people pleasing softy. I almost went for it. I later asked my mom if ss could stay with her and she said yes. So that's what we did. He was mad at me all day but he cooled down later when he came home with his D and I surprised her (and of course him) when she came in and found a huge Bday balloon and a gift she always wanted.

Setting boundaries and keeping boundaries is hard work.

Well a miracle happened...when H took daughter home yesterday, he told his son "come on, you're going with me". Of course the son wanted to stay but H knew I didn't want him to stay alone with me. They left and then H came back with S because he leaves for school monday mornings from our home to school and then to BM.

What a milestone, now I just have to keep a gun by the line I drew called "Boundary".