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Demon Child

TheOtherMom's picture

I really believe BM could not put up with some of the things that we do because she lives in a pipe dream and has a hard time with reality. She never had to deal with getting the kids ready for school because her BF would do it, she didn't have to do homework with them because her parents would do it, and she didn't have to spend the weekends with fighting kids because she would take SS11 out to do stuff and leave SS9 at home (this is all in the year she had them while both DH and I were deployed).

Hence my blog this morning as I sip a homemade caramel machiatto. Don't you love the smell of freshly brewed coffee?

This morning, SS9, this sweet little boy who looks like he is 7 due to his short stature and is as immature as a small child, complained that he doesn't have any more long sleeve shirts to wear with his school uniform. I explained that since he was hoarding them under his bed instead of washing them, these are the consequences.

HOLY COW. The tantrum that ensued! But he is not stupid - emotionally immature but a smart ass makes for a bad combination. The tantrum that entailed included, but is not limited to, shutting his door and yelling at the top of his lungs that he might get sick and die of pneumonia! WHO IS THIS CHILD??????????

He is calmer now but OMG! I feel like I am dealing with a demon child some days.

On another note, why can't this kid change his underwear regularly? Even when he takes a shower, he will put dirty underwear back on! I don't get it. They don't address this in Parenting magazine ...

Comments

dakotamom's picture

Good luck with that. I"m jealous that he showers. ss15 wont' do this.
I laugh picturing you drinking your coffee as the child yells in the background!! they're so dramatic aren't they???

taytay803's picture

UNFORTUNATELY no all they do talk about is the first few years ant teen or tween years because if they did I would be the first in line to buy that for BM so she can learn how to parent I would buy her a 6 yr subscription to it hence that's how long we have to go until youngest SD is 18.

SillyGilly's picture

When my DH was divorced he made arrangements for an Au Pair to live/work at his house so on his weeks (50/50) he had child care built in, knowing he couldn't take off work to pick them up from school, etc... When I first started dating him he was transitioning from one Au Pair to the next (they typically stay 1-2 years). The "new" gal was from Germany and her english was poor at best so there were many language barriers at first. Well, I understood her perfectly clear when she expressed concern for SS12 (or thirteen??) not changing his underwear! She said she did his laundry and there was only ONE pair to wash after TWO weeks. EEEEEWWWWW!! She said she asked him where all his underwear was and he said he just puts the same pair back on after his shower because #1 he is clean when he puts them on so whats the big deal (as in, they don't get dirty because he is not dirty when he first wears them, I guess?) and #2 they are his favorite pair. OMG YUCKY!! I don't understand this phase - he was not raised at DH's OR BM's house to not change his underwear, even BM managed to teach the skids that! BOYS! I think they are just smelly and gross by nature!! I'm trying to think how we resolved it - I think DH had to threaten to punish SS to change his underpants. Whether he actually changed them or just started putting clean pairs in the hamper I'll never know!

caregiver1127's picture

My SS was the same way I did his laundry once and he had 1 pair of underwear in the pile - I sat him down and had a talk with him - he is a clean freak which I like - he just didn't think about changing his underwear he had about 20 pairs of boxers and it took about a month of reminding him to change then he started changing his underwear regularly - he also one time had a sore on his big toe and was afraid to tell anyone and the sock actually grew attached to the foot - I am a nurse and had never been a mother - I worked PM shifts so I thought he was taking showers at night and DH thought he took the shower in the morning after he left for work. I am not sure how long he went without showering but once the sock grew attached to the foot he was afraid to tell anyone and I think he wore that sock for almost 2 weeks straight - it was the weirdest thing I had ever seen (I had never had children so knew nothing about habits or such never had the opportunity from birth to raise a child I was clueless) but being a nurse I was able to detach the sock and take care of the foot and explain to him that he needs to shower and if he has something wrong he needs to tell me.

dakotamom's picture

eeeeewwwwwwww!!!! that just made me do the full body ICK shake!!!! I agree that it's a gross boy thing!!!! is there a parenting step being missed here?? why does it seem like so many people have these gross stories about boys not showering and wearing the same underwear and not washing clothes???

caregiver1127's picture

I think in our case I worked PM shift and DH worked Day shift we both thought he was taking a shower on the other's watch - this also happened to my DD when she was first born - I though DH was giving her baths in the sink and he thought I was - she went about 6 weeks without a proper bath but we were both washing her just not giving a bath - it was winter and I live in a very cold area so I was not too concerned about it. But DH and I did learn after the no shower problem that we needed to talk more!

dakotamom's picture

ok, but you're on different shifts....granted communication might have helped! HAHA
but seriously - i'm not the only one that complains about stinky kid that doesn't shower/brush teeth/change into clean clothes daily.
I'm not used to boys - my family is mainly girls except i now have a 2 yr old nephew.
what is missed that girls dont' seem to have a problem with this except a select few and boys are completely different that most seem to be gross except the select few??

TheOtherMom's picture

I had to pinch my pennies so I made a cutback in my coffee expenses and researched it online about 8 months ago and have been doing it ever since. My husband bought me the espresso maker for Mother's Day so that helped cut the costs:

http://www.ehow.com/how_2150942_very-own-caramel-macchiato-home.html

PS - it is all about the caramel ... the richer the better the machiatto tastes

Bojangles's picture

Get sick and die of pneumonia - that's funny! Those are the best tantrums, the one's that a re patently ridiculous. I like the picture of you sipping your coffee as he faces up to his brutal short sleeved future in his bedroom. The hygiene thing is a really frustrating mystery, SS has always had to be prompted to shower, I don't understand it, I come from a shower-a-day family and love my morning shower, but all my step children seem to have a much more random approach to washing from BM's house. Every time I would get cross with DH about the fact that SS had not had his shower he would nod sagely and tell me it would all change as soon as SS got interested in girls, and sure enough a few weeks ago SS13 started showering voluntarily and washing and styling his hair regularly. If only I could thank the object of his affections!

iwishyouwould's picture

Dude. LOL.... My 13 year old brother came to spend six days with us and brought one pair of underwear and one pair of socks. I had to bribe him to go to target with me and pick out some more boxers. Then I had to tease him to no end to get him to actually wear them. Teenage boys are weird.