Not sure what to do, but need someone to talk to; my first reaction is to throw my SD out of my house
I was doing a room search of SD's room (she takes stuff without permission, hides food in her room, there's also a no toy rule due to staying up way too late, etc) and found a wad of cash ($25+) along with some 1's and loose change hidden on her closet shelf.
Now mind you a little change here & there and a few dollars I could understand but she has a wallet, purse & piggy bank.
But when I searched that area a few days ago there was nothing & I have a habit of stashing $20s $1's and $5's in our vehicles (dad sent her out into the van alone into the center console -off limits, to get his paycheck), dad leaves change in cup holders around the house etc
She claims she just "found" it but in the past 3-4 years we have gone over the loose money rules in our home (ie bring it to an adult, dont just assume you can have it, ask first).
& I wouldnt be worried if it was a few bucks but a large wad in less than a few days concerns me, I leave my wallet & purse upstairs, plus I stash money in the diaper bag, vehicles, bra (so it ends up in the laundry), etc.
I dont know how to approach her dad or deal with this.
Im very upset because if she will take some money without asking and hide it, what else is she or will she take? jewerly (my good stuff is locked up but I still have not so cheap earrings, necklaces and rings, all downstairs)? she's already stolen meds (which I moved all downstairs into our room), locked our pantry at night so she cant get into stuff that may make her sick.
In short if I had somewhere to send her I would. If I had proof she stole I would call the cops.
Im tempted to put a wireless cam in our living room to record to my pc when we arent upstairs (master is in the basement) just to see what she is up to at night and in the am.

Ive also discussed with my SO once my sister is placed to move upstairs (the home was originally 3 bedrooms 1 bath and someone put a master suite in the daylight basement) so maybe we can keep a better eye on her.

I want to see if there is a summer treatment camp type therapy program she can attend but SO & her are such flakes during counseling its a joke and due to my disability I cant haul the baby up the enormous flight of stairs, she needs a shrink not a damn social worker to play games and have play dates with groups.

I get frustrated because I feel like I have to watch her almost as much as I would my 10 month old.