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Lol there is a "Don't be a Douche - Part 4" - and I just can't even care anymore haha

Sparklelady's picture

Last night my hubby asked me if I installed spy software on newly estranged SS16's laptop.
Uh, no. :?

Apparently BM told SS16 to get his computer wiped and change his phone number to stop my "hi tech" spying on him (and by proxy, her.) She has accused me of installing spyware to monitor all his messages. You see, she was caught conspiring with SS16 behind DH's back. But not by any high-tech means, my stupid SS16 simply opened his phone one day and I saw him enter the code. Not terribly difficult to then access everything he's been up to. I am however greatly intrigued that BM automatically assumed that spyware must've been installed. It does bring to mind the old saying that people only accuse you of what they themselves have done.

DH is struggling, he's back and forth between furious and crushed by SS16's deception. He just left me and said he's going to write BM and SS16 a long letter and I would I please proof read it for him? I hope writing it makes him feel better, because I don't think it'll bring the result he's hoping for. Sad

Comments

Sparklelady's picture

Wow crazy how similar the stories are! I'll encourage HIM to read that blog and all the responses. If nothing else, he'll see he's not alone. I know we can't change a damn thing. SS16 isn't just under her thumb - he made a choice too. Although I have always said he has absolutely no thoughts of his own. Just choose the easiest possible path at all times. :sick:

oneoffour's picture

Actually I would be quite flattered BM thinks you are so 'techy' and sneaky. Quite possibly you worked at 'The Farm: but you could never tell anyone that, can you? Biggrin

I know these men expect so much more from their sons. But for now his son is working in the 'here and now' and does not consider long term consequences. So disappointing his father doesn't register. He has no idea what 'disappointment' means. He thinks he is The King. And he too will face disappointment. Your DH just has to shut the door on his son for the time being. Just falls off the radar. When his son needs him he will come looking. BM will let him down. I have seen it time and time again. By then DH may not be so "Prodigal Sons Father" and just hold his son accountable.

Sparklelady's picture

I agree, walk away and leave it be. He's almost there. Just licking his wounds. (And I'm secretly thrilled he's so pissed. Makes a nice change in our dynamics for once!)

Monchichi's picture

Why do these men always want us to proof read their correspondence with their ex's/ mothers/ therapists? How did they communicate before us? Jokes aside, it's my least favorite thing I do for my SO. I proof read his things. I'm sorry you're going through this and your SS is a little sh&t for not being honest with his father.

misSTEP's picture

LOL Our BM would get so flustered with what we knew about when she thought she was keeping us in the dark. Ummm, it's called the Internet. More specifically, Google!

Sparklelady's picture

Yep! But I can't believe she went to such lengths to stop us from knowing what he's up to. I mean, I CAN, but I can't.