This warrents a new blog post.   SS has been in counseling for two years now.  The first counselor he saw when he decided he wanted to be homeschooled last year and decided he wasn't going to do work anymore.  That counselor was a piece of work.   He basically took this manipulative kid at face value and informed his father that I was passive/agressive and how dare he let me treat hsi son like this.  He also went on to tell DH that he was a horrible father , all his son wanted to do was be a chief and here he was not letting his son cook.  DH informed the counselor that we have a grocery list posted on the refreigerator for anybody to add to, he had also taken the son to the grocery store several times and asked him what he wanted or needed so that he could cook.  Several times I had said you don't like what I cook, you cook, tell me what you need and we'll make it happen.  The invitation was there.   The son went to not talking to any of us, being totally disrespectful ( not much better now I know) and basically melting down constantly.  DH pulled him out of that counselor and he didn't see one for about six months.  Another counselor was found when he decided to drop out of school this year.  So far I'm not impressed.  SS was on medication for anxiety and depression which he expressed interest in being off of, go ahead.  Bio-mother suggested the CBD oil so medication was dropped and gummies were taken.   The counselor supported all of this.  SS expressed interest in working out at a gym.  She told DH that she would waive one session fee if he enrolled him at the college gym.  This she hoped would inspire SS to be interested in college.   SS was enrolled in a gym , a new gym town that has been open for thre weeks , he has not gone.  However he is going back to school.  I'm not even sure how often he sees this counselor as he has not gone for two weeks .  Oh yes , I should mention that I carry the insurance for the family.  

This child has also been diagnosed with high functioning autism.  He was 15 when he was diagnosed.  My son also has autism.  So yes the child has a disability but even with a disability a certain level of behavioral expectation is expected.  My son also has Mental Retardation but he manages to put his dishes in the dishwasher, clean up after himself, join the family .  

As of right now I am paddling up hill in a sinking canoe headed toward a waterfall.   Yes I had trepedation about getting married to his father and yes I am kicking myself.   Yes DH enables his son, we've talked about it.  His daughter has even talked to him about it.