Hello everyone, what an awesome site this is!!! I have been with BF for just over 8 years and we have been engaged for 2 of those years. I have 3 SS’s (18, 15 & 11) with the same BM and no bio children myself  but one day hopefully I will. BM kicked SS18 out of her house and sent him to live with BF and myself when he was about 14 years old, so he has been with us ever since. BM still has primary custody of the younger 2 boys and we see them EOWE.
The first 4 years of our relationship was hell. I experienced BM verbal abused on many occasions and her TRYING to bitch slap me once which she didn’t succeed in doing, all in front of the 3 boys. She had me barred from school performances, she told BF that I was not to be in the car during drop offs and pickups and outright told BF to drop me off on a street corner to wait for him like a prostitute or she will ring the police for trespassing or he will not be allowed to have the kids for that weekend. She use to threaten BF that if he didn’t give her a cheque for a certain amount then not to bother bring the boys back to her. This was always on a Sunday evening when the kids were due back to BM within a couple of hours, she knew we both worked early Monday morning, she knew we lived 1 hour away from their schools and couldn’t drop them off in the morning (I still can’t believe to this day all the extra money she got out of BF and myself). All of this was just the tip of the iceberg.
Fast-forward 4 years and wow, to my amazement BM does a total 360 on me mainly because her son (14 at the time) was now in my care full time with her having only EOWE access. She became decent to deal with, she preferred to deal with me over BF and all in all besides a few hiccups with SS18 things were going okay she didn’t step on my toes and I didn’t step on hers.
Recently though, the wheels in motion started to turn the wrong way and yes I will admit mostly because of my doing and refusing to be BM’s doormat. About 2 weeks ago I sent BM an email finally spewing 8 years of held in frustration, in a respectful yet forceful manner I basically told her that she is SS18 mother not me and to step up and act like one, cause as of now I refused to do ANYTHING for that ungrateful douche bag of a person. I also explained that seeing that she herself has been a step mother for a couple of years that I’m sure she can understand where I am coming from. BM has stated in the past that she hates her skids BM and the way she acts, open your eyes and grow up woman you are acting exactly like the woman you despise.
Anyhow, I hope by joining this site I can offer some wisdom from my past experiences and gather a little more from all you wise step mummies out there as I’m sure the next 8 years is going to be one hell of a ride that’ll I’m sure at one stage or another I’ll want to get off.
Thanks for reading.