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oh the drama!

rjs1069's picture

Hi everyone!
Its been forever since ive been on this site. I dont know what happened. I love this site and have no clue how it slipped out of my grasp for so long! anyway, sooo much has gone on and im sure will always go on but one thing that I really need to vent about is this. I have been living in the same neighborhood since 1985. yes 1985. The street i grew up on is the same street my DH and i bought a house on. Our home is small, its a little starter home with a nice piece of land that we hope to build on. Well the BM has stumbled upon a bf that owns his own business and has since had her grubby little paws all over this business and has been spending money like its burning a hole in her pocket. well she has also decided to purchase a house on our street! (the closing is in a few weeks apparently.)its a large house with a 2 door garage and a pool. She is only doing it to piss us off. My ss is so excited but we can already see the problems arising. She is already telling me that i cannot walk by her house if i am out exercising ( its a dead end street) amongst other made up rules. I am so sick to my stomach over this because i know what is to come. There are going to be issues upon issues.... she even threw fits about me attending my ss football games and cheering! she tried to make it so i couldnt attend! *certifiably insane* I am trying to act like it wont bother me, put it out of my head but she has to drive by our house to leave the neighborhood and i will be seeing her constantly. if you read some previous blogs she cannot just ever leave me and my dh alone. ever. constant calls, texts, emails, accusations, etc. and we were really trying to ignore as much as possible and get her out of our lives as much as possible and now its going to be IMPOSSIBLE! HELP!!!!

Comments

caregiver1127's picture

I think you should not only walk by her house but go around that cul de sac in your car about 10 times do the circle with the horn honking and then buy a dog and have it shit in her yard every morning and every night - also take your DH for long romantic walks and right in front of her house have a make out session - lol

Sorry you have to go through this - if my BM moved in down the street I would be on death row for pre-meditated murder that would happen about a week after she moved in - next time she says you can't walk in front of her house just pull out a sign and have STFU written on it smile sweetly and walk on.

GoodbyeNormaJean's picture

Caregiver, I was just thinking that about the dog doo!

What kind of dog do you have? Is it a large dog? If not, get one immedietely. I fostered a Mastiff once that made ENORMOUS poops! Maybe you could just offer to walk one for a friend. Also save up any extra dog shit you can get and save it up to take over to her yard at night. You know. For fertilizer. Like a neighborly neighbor.

Jsmom's picture

I am in the same hell. Our BM lives in the next subdivision and I see her all the time. Never any peace. The nice thing is there is actually no drop off drama anymore they just come here after school on our week. I did actually change my dog walking route because I wanted to have less interaction with her. She jogs past our house, the SD drives the golf cart past our house. It is so fun....

skylarksms's picture

Where do these entitlement-minded BMs come off thinking that they own not only the house, but the street and sidewalk too!!

I know it's tough but try to ignore her. Your happiness is your greatest revenge.

Make sure she knows/sees how happy you are DESPITE her!

purpledaisies's picture

I have a question, what makes you think she will stay? I mean really if this is just her BF and she is spending HIS money, what happens if they brake up??? I bet she will lose her house??? LOL

Really though I would do what the other girls said walk in front of her house every single day and do what I could to be overly nice and sweet! }:)

angelbeth's picture

oh no that stinks. I woould walk past here house. I would also just ignore her too. I know that is hard and will not be easy. I just do not get people. she has a bf and has moved on and yet the still cause so much trouble good luck

skylarksms's picture

Sometimes, certain people seem to THRIVE on the drama, like they are addicted to it.

Our BM is certainly one of those - as well as the BMs of a LOT of posters on this site!!

My H waffles back and forth between the drama-lover and the doormat.

rjs1069's picture

great ideas ladies! i am laughing as i read these! thanks so much for putting a smile on my face. The bottom line is i cant do anything about it so, i have to some how let it go and make the best of it.....i plan on walking my ass around our neighborhood daily and hopes she sees me. and when and if she plans on pulling in our driveway to say hi or see her son if we are playing outside she will be told to drag her ass! she can wave to him as she drives by, but thats about all im allowing. if she was a normal, nice, decent person that didnt wake up everyday trying to make my life a living hell i would have no problem with her seeing her son if she were to drive by but she created this...not me! i will keep you all posted on the house/walk/moving drama as it continues~ im sure there are going to be some great stories to come of this. Maybe i will write a book! haha

ThatGirl's picture

I spent 10 years living just down the street from my ex-husband. It was pure hell, and he loved every minute of it. We purchased both houses when we were married. He kept the big house and I kept the tiny little rental after the divorce.It was degrading for me, seeing him living in the house I had so painstakingly decorated and landscaped, in the garage that I used to park in, while I was stuck in the little two bedroom/ one bathroom house with no garage and the boys had to share a bedroom. It made me feel like a total failure. Here a was struggling single mom, having to work for the first time in 13 years to support myself and children (I didn't get SS or CS) while he was living the high life in my old home, just up the street.

I was very good at ducking and dodging him (learned to do it during our marriage), I even changed my walking time to later in the evening when I knew he'd already be passed out. Every once in a while I would get stuck passing him on the street. I would just stare straight ahead and keep going. Then he would complain to the kids that I didn't wave. LOL it actually bugged him! Once I knew that, I quit hiding so much, but kept on ignoring him. Then I felt more like I had the upper hand and it was much easier.

The other thing you'll have to watch out for, is that if she's anything like my ex, she'll make it a point to become friends with all of your neighbors. She'll become the life of the party and will be at every BBQ on the street, just to make you uncomfortable. Or at least that's what my husband did. That hurt, too, but only lasted a year or two until everyone saw his true colors and was onto his game.

On the plus side, as mentioned earlier, it's much easier for the kids. Same school and bus stop, same friends, walking distance if they forget something.

She's doing this to bug you. My best advice is to simply ignore her. Don't give her the satisfaction seeing you irritated by it. Pretend you don't care. Keep your head up and just walk on by as if you don't even know her.