Right now, FDH has the skids most of the time. They go to BM's one night per week and EOWE. Their divorce decree states this arrangement and that neither parent will seek child support for the minor children.

FDH didn't push getting CS from her because he makes so much more than her - CS from her in our state would amount to a whopping $150/mo. He never wanted ill will, so he never wanted to pursue it (despite the fact that he pays for 100% of everything for them). I disagree and thought he should have, even if only to put away in savings account for the boys, but whatever.

Anyway, it looks like skid1 will be going to live with her for at least the next 1.5 years (long story, will blog about it soon) and skid2 will continue to reside with FDH. He thinks the twunt orchestrated all of this to be able to file for CS for skid1. He briefly consulted an attorney, who told him that in order to do so, she would need to go to court to get a custody order in place first. Once that is established, she can indeed get CS because of their income disparity (despite FDH still having skid2), roughly in the amount of $500/mo (which wouldn't *kill* us, but would have an immediate impact on our finances). He has no problem supporting his kids - he's been doing it on his own for years. He's just worried that BM won't use CS on skid1 and will instead continue to send him to dad when he needs or wants something, just as she does now, because "she has no money."

He's not super worried, because he doubts she'll be able to afford an attorney, and she's fairly braindead, so she'd have a heck of a time filing herself. Also, it seems she would have to expose herself for food stamp fraud, since she receives a ridiculous amount in food stamps and assistance, no doubt gotten by lying about her custodial status.

I'm wondering about whether or not he can go after her for back CS for the years he did not receive any, despite the way the decree is written. I mean, if she can ignore what the decree says and file for CS why can't he? Does anyone have any experience with this kind of thing?

And a vent: FDH has been seriously stressing about this whole thing, because if it came to pass we'd have to reconsider some life changing moves we're contemplating. Last night was her night with the skids. She is supposed to pick them up, but texted FDH to say that skid1 was already at her house and he was starving, so she needed to cook dinner and he needed to drop skid2 off to her. And there he went, skipping away to BM's tune in the middle of rush hour. Gone almost an hour because of traffic. When he tried to complain to me about driving all over town, I shut him right down. He didn't *have* to do it. He could have just said no, and she could have figured out that she needed to arrange her meal preparation around her other obligations. JHC.