Hey guys, I'm posting under this comment because I don't know how to use the site yet. I moved in with my boyfriend about three months ago and his son just mocks me when I ask for him to do homework,he's failing in school, his mother is practically not in the picture except for two weeks out of the year, he was just diagnosed with ADHD and I'm so lost with how to handle him. He lies about homework, he just doesn't want to do it. I, and his dad are very concerned because even taking away his PlayStation and phone doesn't do it. He says he doesn't care. We are very big into a family oriented sport but I'm really struggling with how to go about getting him to realize he is in the wrong because all he does is lie. He throws tantrums and I think he's hurting. Please help!
SS (stepson) is not your child, thus stop parenting, stop caring if he does not do his homework, it's not your responsibility, he has to bio parents who can parent....
Disengage from SS,,that means you do nothing for him, no discipline, not parenting, no cleaning, no laundry, no driving around nothing.... Daddy can do that for him.....
You never enter his room, but if he leaves his stuff in communal areas' simply tell him, SS pick up your stuff and take it to your room - he will ignore you, after an hour or so you are a very nice and good SM, you pick it up for him and now you have 2 options... either dump it in the trash or simply flung it into his room
I use to trash things, then I figured it's not helping, she gets new ones on demand... so I started throwing it into her room from her door..... school books, shoes, cloths you name it... SO would get angry at me I would simply say... I asked her to clean, she refused, and the rule is... your room can be in any way you want, but the living room will be tidy at all times...
The thing is that I am pretty much his mother. His father works from early morning and doesn't get home until 6. I'm a stay at home mom. Always have been. I don't think he resents me but he is used to getting his way no matter what because it has always just been him and his dad. It's really stressful on me because my own two kids do what they have to do without question. But I think you all are right in that I have to leave the discipline to his father. Things haven't been easy for them either. Just wish there was some way to make him understand what he does is wrong and not get away with acting out....
When my bf and I got together I was working for my family's business. The business of 30 years + went into bankruptcy. I am always trying to find ways to support my kids and I. I'm not some lazy bum. I wasn't looking for advice on my life, was looking for advice on how to handle a stepchild that doesn't cooperate with me and never has with his father who has full custody either. I don't think not being there for him is the right advice.
Comments
Hi, I'm new to this but could
Hi, I'm new to this but could use some advice
Hey guys, I'm posting under
Hey guys, I'm posting under this comment because I don't know how to use the site yet. I moved in with my boyfriend about three months ago and his son just mocks me when I ask for him to do homework,he's failing in school, his mother is practically not in the picture except for two weeks out of the year, he was just diagnosed with ADHD and I'm so lost with how to handle him. He lies about homework, he just doesn't want to do it. I, and his dad are very concerned because even taking away his PlayStation and phone doesn't do it. He says he doesn't care. We are very big into a family oriented sport but I'm really struggling with how to go about getting him to realize he is in the wrong because all he does is lie. He throws tantrums and I think he's hurting. Please help!
welcome lady Maryb SS
welcome lady Maryb
SS (stepson) is not your child, thus stop parenting, stop caring if he does not do his homework, it's not your responsibility, he has to bio parents who can parent....
Disengage from SS,,that means you do nothing for him, no discipline, not parenting, no cleaning, no laundry, no driving around nothing.... Daddy can do that for him.....
You never enter his room, but if he leaves his stuff in communal areas' simply tell him, SS pick up your stuff and take it to your room - he will ignore you, after an hour or so you are a very nice and good SM, you pick it up for him and now you have 2 options... either dump it in the trash or simply flung it into his room
I use to trash things, then I figured it's not helping, she gets new ones on demand... so I started throwing it into her room from her door..... school books, shoes, cloths you name it... SO would get angry at me I would simply say... I asked her to clean, she refused, and the rule is... your room can be in any way you want, but the living room will be tidy at all times...
pinkB - no we do not need a
pinkB - no we do not need a chat room here lol.....
I agree. I think that could
:jawdrop: I agree.
I think that could be a clusterf*ck.
Thank you for your feedback
Thank you for your feedback and how to use the site.
The thing is that I am pretty
The thing is that I am pretty much his mother. His father works from early morning and doesn't get home until 6. I'm a stay at home mom. Always have been. I don't think he resents me but he is used to getting his way no matter what because it has always just been him and his dad. It's really stressful on me because my own two kids do what they have to do without question. But I think you all are right in that I have to leave the discipline to his father. Things haven't been easy for them either. Just wish there was some way to make him understand what he does is wrong and not get away with acting out....
When my bf and I got together
When my bf and I got together I was working for my family's business. The business of 30 years + went into bankruptcy. I am always trying to find ways to support my kids and I. I'm not some lazy bum. I wasn't looking for advice on my life, was looking for advice on how to handle a stepchild that doesn't cooperate with me and never has with his father who has full custody either. I don't think not being there for him is the right advice.
Thanks for your comments.
Thanks for your comments. Didn't sign up for this