:I honestly didn't date at 19. I wouldn't fret too much. I went out with friends in high school. NEVER went on second dates. I had no interest in a relationship. At 19 I didn't want one either. I would OCCASIONALLY be with friends. But I focuse dmy time and effort elsewhere. I wasn't ready for relationships until AFTER I had met DH. We talked for literally 8 months before I agreed to date him.

Don't fret over it too much!!!

Does your SS live to divide the adults in his life? Meaning does he go back and forth between bio parents playing both sides and at the same time slyly trying to come between your relationship?

I have found that skids put so much energy into destroying their own life and what surrounds it rather than building it for themselves. There isn't time left for anything else. They sit in their rooms and stew and rue on what they can do next. Who can they play. Who can they sneer at or push the limit too. Then they pout when it doesn't work and the cycle continues. 

I don't think it has anything to do with sexuality but rather their need for control. 

Yes!! My SS18 hasn't had a GF since middle school (if you can even count that). He has gained a lot of weight the last two years, showers about once a month and has only set foot in my laundry room once since he moved in 7 months ago. He also changed jobs (after a two week "break" immediately following his first full 40-hour work week ever) to one where he sits on ass all day long doing assembly line quality control. It pays $2 less an hour than his old job, " but they have air conditioning and I can sit down all day!" Geez, I can't imagine why he's struggling with the ladies...

SD16 told DH lastnight that no boy at her school is worth her time. She's pretty arrogant for an average looking chunky girl. How bout they wont look at you cuz you stuff you size 12 body in size 10 clothes.

I guess I don't see what the problem is? Better for someone NOT to date when they aren't responsible enough to care for themselves, much less someone else. The likelihood that someone who is irresponsible for themselves is going to find someone responsible and well-adjusted is pretty small. I'd count is a blessing that a teen isn't dating. That's one less thing to worry about.

That being said, I also think the younger generations don't want what their parents had. 50% chance of divorce where you lose half (or more) of everything? Two loads of student loan debt? Possibility of having a GUBM/GTBF who will take your kids away? No real financial benefit to being in a relationship versus just having roommates?

Yeah, the younger generations aren't dumb. They watched their parents get divorced, and for men, they watched their fathers get reemed by the court system. They have either lived through the recession as a young adult, or they grew up in it. The appeal of long-term relationships and marriage just isn't there. The benefits aren't what they used to be. Easier to live in a hook-up culture until they are older and somewhat established (because unskilled labor pays zilch) before making plans to settle down.

He appreciates girls apparently and watches them out of the corner of his eye. Not avoidant of social contact but he speaks of how guys can get derailed in life before they have a chance @ college & career ... Apparently there is a quiet movement of young men who support each other to do stuff & not get "trapped." There's an acronym but I dont remember it.

SGD in contrast was "dating" @ 12 -- hooking up w/men at 14. SGS-12 is a convicted sex offender ... SD was pregnant at 15.

Neither group are similar to when I was in high school, back in the dark ages.

he is in uni but so far no girl friend. I mean how is he gonna get a girl when he’s just sleeping or playing computer games when not at uni

i find his behaviour repulsive, he dresses messily and untidy, fidgets and sniffles all the time. It would be a major surprise to hubby if he brought a girl home. 

I know ss would tell his dad to make me cook something for when his lady friend (if he manages to get one) comes over but i’d be hell no! You can order take out, i’m not playing nice and faking smiles.

sd is 22 and no guy friends yet, how can she when bio mum controls her like a hawk and she blindly stupidly follows bio mum and stepdads every whim. It’ll be a major surprise if they ever managed to get a partner with their current character and behaviours/personality traits.

Means no pregnancy scares!  I’d consider it a blessing, especially for someone with little to no drive.

One of the SDs in my life has been boy crazy since the age of 12, and did have a pregnancy scare at 15 (another story).

So when she announced to my SO that she was now bisexual (we think for a reaction, because we do not care what consenting adults do and they know it), my SO responded, “I’m all for it since you can’t get pregnant with a girl” and laughed.  

 To his chagrin, she’s only dated boys since then (and is thankfully now on birth control!) *biggrin*

Have you considered asking SS..."Hey dude, do you have a  girl we don't know about yet? LOLOLOL"

Be very happy he doesn't ...in a way it's common sense to get his life straight first. Last thing YOU want is some girl telling him "I am pregnant" like a new adult kid  I Know. NO, its not my kid THANK GOD.

I grew up during an era that by age 18 males either joined the service, had a job 'already' at the foundary they kept working at, OR some went on to college. College was not the norm but the exception. Men learned a trade that would sustain them thru their lives.  

What WAS the norm is you had a girl who was going ot be your wife out of high school. At around age 16 she was given a PRE-ENGAGEMENT ring (remember those) then it became an engagement ring. Her parents would have given her a "Hope Chest" for her 16th bday,  whereby relatives would start to help her fill it up with things to set up house.

Parents would have never EVER approved of the local town hussy being brought home for Sunday Supper.

I miss those day honestly.

Be happy---sounds like a smart kid if you really want my opinion. He will find his way on way or another.