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Always BM...Never Puke

over step's picture

Let me preface this by saying I love my MIL and Puke is the only thing we don't always see eye to eye on.

DH and MIL both believe that BM is completely to blame for Puke not being nice to me. While I agree that BM has had her hand in this, I don't think Puke is completely innocent.

Puke is the one going back to BM and talking shi!t about me. Puke is the one making up shi!t about me to tell BM. Puke chooses not to treat me with respect. Puke blames me for everything. Puke started all the BS. But she is innocent? I think not.

It still kills me that they also think that Puke has nothing to do with BM not bringing her for visits. I think BM would if Puke said she really wanted to. It's just curious that now BM doesn't want to bring Puke after our talk. I think it's more like Puke doesn't want to come because she messed up and can't face it. Of course, BM isn't going to make Puke come because Puke has said how mean I am.

I just don't get where DH and MIL see Puke is not to blame. Maybe their hate for BM is so strong they would rather put the blame on her.

Comments

over step's picture

I think MIL has enabled DH by saying that there is nothing he can do about it. Plus, DH doesn't tell MIL everything Puke has done or said about me.

over step's picture

He doesn't anymore. Before, I don't know why. I always held him responsible for not stopping it. For me, it just let me know where I stood with her and knew to move on from her. I guess if you think about it, he was doing the same thing Puke was doing. Almost makes one believe he didn't want us to get along.

robin333's picture

Easier to blame BM than acknowledge that your kid/grandkid is a lying, selfish a*s.

Maxwell09's picture

I've caught DH and his family try to do this with SS. One time he was running wild at DH's parents house and his grandmother (DH's mom's mom) made the comment he was so wild because he had just got back from BM's and she doesn't do much with him. I defended BM because it wasn't true, I told her that not only does BM do a lot with him, she sends her other kid away so it can be just her and SS. He gets plenty of attention so he was acting wild because he knows DH's mom always lets the kids go crazy. Same with if DH acts differently than normal, an outburst or tantrum when he's usually very mild tempered, DH will say it's BMs fault but I told him it really doesn't matter who's fault it is the problem is the kid needs to learn how to express his feelings when he's frustrated. Can't blame your parents all your life, if all SS hears is its BMs fault or DHs fault he acts whatever way then he's going to do that for the rest of his life.

Monchichi's picture

Sally,that's cute. Now for the reality check, biological grannies NEVER believe the fault lies with the child.