I knew that was what he was going to say. I've spent countless hours researching family law online. I've read NCP and co-parenting blog sights until I've gone cross-eyed. I could recite the signs of parental alienation from memory. So, nothing we heard today was a surprise.

But that doesn't mean it hurts any less. I looked at my DH as he talked with the lawyer, and it broke my heart. Not because he was angry, or sad....but because he was relieved. He has been dragged through hell and back by BM, but when the lawyer told him that he could walk away from all this....well, I think that was what DH has been waiting to hear for some time.

But how do you walk away from your child? And how do I make this okay for him? How do I make this okay for me?