Maybe I'm just being bitchy, but I want to disengage from DH.

Don't get me wrong, he's a sweet, loving, man. He is fantastic about chores and day-to-day activities. He is great at his job.

In the last six months, there have been a LOT of things he has fallen down on.

The house got hit by a tornado. First estimate for repairs was $80k.

I dealt with the insurance company.
I got the contractor.
I dealt with the bank.

We moved in FIVE MONTHS AGO, and haven't gotten the final bill from the contractor. We NEED this, because the insurance company wants it as proof that we actually repaired the house - if we didn't repair it, we got a check for the depreciated value of repairs, if we did, we get the full value. Right now, *I* am $20,000 out of pocket.

I got sent to a school (am still here) over a month ago, and asked DH to contact the contractor to get everything finalized. He has done NOTHING.

*I* initiated a house refinance. I bought the house with a 5.625% fixed 30-yr loan. I locked in a 3.5% fixed 15-yr loan. Since *I* have paid down so much principal, the payments will stay the same, chopping 9 years off the loan. When we got the loan paperwork to sign - whoopsie! DH ran up his credit cards to the tune of $10,000!! So there goes $10k to pay those off! I got sent to school and asked DH to contact the appraiser, because I'm across the country. He did NOTHING. Insists I didn't send him the info. The locked rate is about to expire, so I'm going to re-do (and this will cost me another $350 for the paperwork) and keep the entire thing in my name.

SD15 has been miserable with BM.

I found DH the lawyer.
I got the recording equipment.
I schemed for ways to get proof that BM was batshit nuts.

Will DH actually turn on the recording equipment? No. He just wants to bitch to me about how BM hung up on him, and doesn't respect him. Well shit, I don't respect him much right now either!! Now that SD15 is banging a 20-yr-old who thinks deliberately knocking up his previous girlfriend is a wonderful way to keep her by his side, DH wants charges pressed. I am keeping my mouth shut, and I do NOT want to hear him whining about BM.

DH is in therapy right now. I am expected to attend. Of course, *I* am the bad guy. I am the promise-breaking drunk cheater (all of this behavior he's referencing is from 4 years ago - he did the stupid money and custody crap this year) so it's ALL MY FAULT that he's all screwed up in the head.

I'm making my plans, I think. Next time he offers to get out and start the divorce paperwork, I think I will take him up on it. See, he'd rather run away and tell everybody that I am unreasonable, rather than man up and actually DO something.

FML.