Need Strength Again...
Tomorrow I will be going to my house for the first time in about 3 weeks to start moving the rest of my stuff out and anything else I dang well please (stbxh has lost his mind if he thinks I'm just going to let him have everything) and it's gonna suck. It's going to be so hard for me to go there and pack up my life from the only man I ever really loved and for some stupid reason still love. I keep realizing more and more that who he is now is not the person I fell in love with and married. I miss the old him, the him that would never have cheated and left me for another woman. I'm still trying to remain dignified through all this but, what I really want to do is smack the ever living shit out of him and her. I'm still holding my head high and not stooping to that level though. I won't give them the satisfaction of seeing me loose it. Not anymore. I'm trying to be done crying over his stupid ass but the truth is I'm still grieving and I have to just give it time. As much as I want to I can't rush that, the only problem with that is I'm not a very paitent person. I'm trying my best though because I know somewhere out there there is something better waiting for me. I'm just taking all this one day at a time, crying when I need to and doing what I have to do for me now. He apparently doesn't care anymore so I'm doing for me. Next step, get my own place and move out of my mom's.
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((Hugs)) You are going to
((Hugs)) You are going to make it through this and find someone to spend the rest of your life with that will treat you with the love and respect you deserve. Just remember- This too shall pass.
Thank you overworked!! I'm
Thank you overworked!! I'm holding on to that for dear life right now. All this still hurts like hell but I know I'm going to come out the other side stronger.
I'm definetly going to be in
I'm definetly going to be in honeybadger mode and will have probably quite a few long islands!
((HUGS)) I know how hard this
((HUGS))
I know how hard this is. I went through something very similar about 3 years ago. I never thought my ex would cheat on me and leave me for someone else but he did..hardest thing I ever went through. I grieved for a long time, and even lost so much weight I went down to 109 pounds. But I kept telling myself I did nothing wrong, HE's the one that screwed up!
Well it took me a year but thats when I met my recent SO, he's waaaaaaaay better than the ex. Except for the skids, and some other issues we recently worked out, Im happy with him.
Whats funny is my ex ended up cheating on the women he left me for, lost his house, lost everything. Now he's alone and trying to get me back. Ha!! Don't think so!! Aint Karma awesome?
anyways you will get through it (I know, I know its hard to see it now) and one day you will look back like I do now and think, what was I thinking? Why did i even shed a tear for that loser?
Hang in there!!
Thank you kitty!! This is by
Thank you kitty!! This is by far the hardest thing I've every had to go through and I've been through some crap.
I just sitting back waiting on the karma train because I recently found out that stbxh did the same thing to BM. I'm still not 100% sure if its true but BM and my stbx sil both said it soooo.... I just keep thinking that if he's done it before he'll do it again to the woman he left me for or she'll cheat on him. She's married also. I'm just gonna watch the train wreck when it happens.
Anytime! Oh I know, I have
Anytime!
Oh I know, I have been through a lot of crap in my life and what happened with my ex was by far the hardest thing I ever had to go through. Not only that but I worked with the guy, so I had to see him everyday which made it even harder!
Sounds like your stbxh is like my ex..I found out he did this to other women. The latest was an affair he was having with the womans friend (the woman he cheated on me with and left me for) and this friend, was married to exes best friend. It was not pretty when it all crashed. And I got to watch it happen, along with the nervous breakdown he suffered at work over it, and ended up getting fired over. Sweet justice!!
Now alls I hear is how much he misses me, how he never loved anyone else like he loved me, how he can't find anyone else like me etc..
Well too bad!
Oh how I love it when I can tell him sorry, you messed up and now Im so much happier than you could ever had made me!
Im sure your stbxh will get his too. You can only get away with this behaviour for so long before it all comes crashing down!
It was hard to see it all while I was grieving. Im sure you likely feel the same way..but trust me, when you come out the other side, you'll be glad this happened. He's not worth it.
I really believe everything
I really believe everything happens for a reason and you were meant to be with someone better who appreciates you. Take it as a learning experience!
I divorced my ex after 5 years of hell. He was an alcoholic and so mean to me. Then when I was not looking, I met DH at a pool!
I think I had to go thru being treated badly to really appreciate DH for how nice and caring he is. If I had stayed with that idiot I never would have met DH.
You should take time to be alone and find yourself again. Then when the time is right you will meet someone. You deserve someone who appreciates you and does not take you for granted. People that cheat are very selfish!
If it's of any help, I highly
If it's of any help, I highly recommend you this forum:
http://survivinginfidelity.com/
Sadly, I've been in a similar case (I blogged here about it a few weeks ago) and the people there are of big help since they've been all through the same shit.
Send you lots of hugs!