I’ve learned there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to be with my husband. I sacrificed my entire life to move with him so he could be with his kids every day. And every morning that I wake up and see his face I know that I wouldn’t change a thing.

I’ve learned that though I don’t “like” kids I don’t mind these ones so much. Kids are kids… and they’re the most frustrating things in the world! But they’re also little learning machines… they pick up what they’re given, and what you give them is what they’re going to pass on to the world some day. I’ve learned that no mater what they’re given at their mother’s house it’s our responsibility to do our very best and set the best example we can every day, it’s all any parent can do for a child.

As an adult step kid I now recognize that my mother and step father were stellar examples of “just do the right thing and the truth will come out in the end” parenting. I HATED and resented my poor step dad while I was growing up and had my birth father on an unshakable pedestal of perfection… he was always the wronged party in my eyes… because he was constantly making statements that reinforced it. “Your mother did this…” and “You know things would be so much better if your mother hadn’t done that” and as a child I lapped it all up like a pup. PAS to the extreme! But my mom and step dad never… and I mean NEVER… said a word against this alcoholic, irresponsible hate machine that called itself my father. Even when he tried his damndest to turn me against them. It took until I was just around graduating college to open my eyes to the truth, but when it happened it changed me forever. And I now see why they went through all of those years of hell with a bratty kid… because they’re good, loving people trying to set the best example possible. I’m now a better person and step parent because of the lesson… positiveity will always triumph over negativity in the end. And the truth always comes out. I really hope all of you struggling with a bratty, unreasonable step child will hold on to that idea.

My step dad’s one of my best friends these days… and every now and then I make sure to apologize for the 16 or so years that I was such a little monster to him. He always laughs and says “it wasn’t that bad”.

He’s a good guy.

I hope one day to be sitting on the back porch with “my” step kids laughing and being the best of friends too. I hope they know we were the “good guys”.