So I need some advise. I am a step-mom a twin girls who are ten. My husband and I have one child together and I have two with my ex-husband. My children all call my husband Dad because my ex has been non existent in there life since they were babies. So here is the problem. My husbands ex-wife has a spending and lying issue. She has spent more money in the past 6 years than most people earn in 12. She has had her home foreclosed on, moved in and out with boyfriends and now is not working yet again. A few moths ago she sent a text message to my husband stating that she was going to make the girls hate me, she was going to make us pay. She was going to do everything in her power to destroy us all because my husband gave his daughter a benadryl. Then a month later she somehow tracked my e-mail down and sent me a letter stating that I stole her husband, I am driving her car and living in her home and I have even gave birth to her child. This is just one of many crazy e-mails and threats she has made.

Now while I was visiting a friend who is dying of cancer she sent my husband an e-mail stating that I was physically abusing him and he was running crying to his adolescent daughters telling them that he can not escape me. The letter further detailed that I was allegedly emotionally abusing the girls. He responded to her b stating that all of the allegations were without merit. This escalated and now she will not let my husband see the girls because of me and our house. She says this is what the girls want.
So when my husband and I discussed the latest e-mail he said that she asked him for money on a phone call previously to the e-mail. She said that she was not working and her fiancee dumped her. She continued to state that she had no money to pay bills. My husband responded with a no and now she is making these crazy allegations. She is coercing the girls to make statements that are untrue about abuse. They are using adult phrases.

Now she is back with her fiancee and she wants alone time with him. I feel like as soon as something else goes wrong with her life she will up the stakes and make even more allegations. Now the girls see and have told us that if you tell a little lie that it's not really a big deal. She really has really problems she has been in for observation on a psych. ward three times for what she calls anxiety. She continues to re-write history. She is telling the girls that if I were not in the picture that she would be back with their father. She told the girls that I stole their father from her which is totally untrue. We have tried to explain that we did not meet until after she was engaged the first time. He has told them that he loves me and that he is not getting back together with her. However, this just inflames the situation. We started counseling for them. However, she the ex-wife is insistent upon taking them before each appointment.

I am afraid of what the next lie is going to be. I also want to know why now they want to come back to the house if there is the alleged abuse. What should I do. Should we question the girls about this. I am scared for my children and their safety. There is so much more but what do I do.