About to lose it...neighbor child is stalking us
My neighbors kid is driving me insane!!! Over the summer he would stop by our house at least twice daily asking if SS13 could come out and play. If he was told no, he would make a rude comment and try to discredit the reason for SS13 not being allowed to come out. The kid is only 7 and I don't think he is intentionally being rude, I think he just hasn't been taught better. We had a few talks with him because I work from home and he was disrupting my work. He didn't seem to grasp the concept of work being a daily thing. He once came by 5 times on the same day! He began POUNDING on the doorbell and then knocking.
He came by one day while it was barely raining. He was told that SS13 could not play in the rain. He asked if they could play in his garage. We said sure. SS13 & this child return to our house (only a few houses down) dripping wet when it's barely raining. He then INFORMED us that his step-dad said he could come to our house to play. It was a bad time for us and we didn't want soaking wet kids in the house. We sent him home and made SS13 change clothes and dry off.
SS13 went to a b-day party at this kids house. After some reports back from SS13 about the kid's sisters behavior and parents lack of discipline over it, we are no longer comfortable allowing SS13 to go to this child's house. There's more to that, but I'm not going to go into it. I feel the child is rarely supervised. He's always playing in the streets. We live in a safe neighborhood, but he's still pretty young to be out by himself as often as he is.
Today he was told that SS13 had to finish homework before going outside to play and that it would be about 15 mins. SS closed the door and began his homework. We then noticed that the kid had his bike blocking our driveway and he was sitting on our doorstep. He even began peaking through our glass door and putting his ear to the door. At a little under 15 mins later he rang the doorbell. I told SS not to answer it until he was ready to go outside. Kid kept ringing it and knocking. I'm about to lose sanity and this child's parents don't care where he is or what he's doing. I feel bad for the kid, but he's not my problem....well actually he's made himself my problem, but I don't want him to be my problem.
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This poor kid isn't being
This poor kid isn't being parented at home. Do him a favor and sit him and down and talk about manners. Teach him some. Explain why what he is doing is rude. If he keeps it up, then start disciplining him for it, as in - No little Harry, if you say rude things or keep coming back SS13 will NOT be allowed to play with you, because we expect his friends to respect us and use manners."
Maybe, just maybe, you might be the adult who really helped him. If not, at least you tried.
We actually did that over the
We actually did that over the summer. We explained that he was disrupting my work. That did not seem to help. We then told him that SS13 was grounded for 2 weeks from playing with him because he continued to disrupt my work. That worked while SS13 was 'grounded' (only from this child), but after that he has picked right back up with his annoying behavior. I think to really make a difference we'll have to have him over more often to teach manners, but I'm not sure how much more of this child I can tolerate. I do feel bad for him though.
We have not straight up told him he's being rude. Maybe we should.
Why is a 13 year old
Why is a 13 year old "playing" with a 7 year old? Is your SS13 really that immature?
I would not be comfortable with a 7 y/o and 13 y/o playing together.
Wow....that was insulting.
Wow....that was insulting. The 7 year old just moved to the neighborhood over the summer. He did not have any friends yet, so he made friends with the neighborhood kids. SS13 and a 10 yr old across the street are some of the few kids on our same street, so he wanted to make friends with them. SS13 and the 10 yr old across the street are both very nice kids who will not exclude others from playing with them (throwing balls in the yard, biking, skateboarding). Both SS13 & the 10 yr old neighbor find the 7 yr old to be annoying at times, but they continue to be nice to him because they're both good kids. SS13 is very slightly immature at times, but not to the point of playing with younger kids. He has plenty of friends his own age, but he's not going to be mean to the 7 yr old.
I did not mean to insult you.
I did not mean to insult you.
What did the little boy do
What did the little boy do the two weeks SS13 was 'grounded'? Did he stay over at his own home or did he just roam aimlessly around the neighborhood like a lost pup? I'm asking because if I thought a 7yr old who just roaming around all day, all by himself without a friend or adult in sight for long lengths of time, I'd begin to wonder what was going on in kid's home. Is he being locked out to go play aka don't bother us for x hours? Is his parents really under the impression that kid is totally welcome all day, every day?
If I thought child was being neglected (locked out, forced to remain out all day ect)I'd probably call CPS and let them take a peek-poo. If I knew that not to be the case and kid is just a pain in the rear I'd do 1)politely talk to his parents letting them know certain days and times are fine but kid can't come all the time. You work from home, weather is inappropriate, SS has days he's busy blah blah or 2) allow SS to let the kid down easy. SS has homework because he's older than kid7. School is harder as kids get older and SS doesn't have as much time to play as he did in the summer. After homework SS has some chores to do and then it will be dinnertime blah blah blah.
If parents and/or kid can't grip #1 or #2, just stop answering the door, pull the drapes/close blinds, keep garage door closed so kid can't see somebody might be home. Ignore the kid on unwelcomed days and unwanted times. SS can still see the child occasionally, be kind to him maybe take a simple snack out to share with kid, let kid tag along when SS's skateboarding...but the daily all day nonstop crap has to end.
I am sorry, I know how hard
I am sorry, I know how hard this can be. Please know that it is not the kid's fault, I think you understand...It is amazing to me how many pathetic parents there are out there. I can't imagine letting my 7yr old run the streets all day...geez.
PS - I would call CPS and tell them there is a 7yr old wondering around all day...
We had a neighbopur kid who
We had a neighbopur kid who is/was an only child. His parents thought the light shined from him and could not understand why when we got home form chrch on Sundays we did not allow their precious to immediately come over and play... Which meant him bossing everyone around. I told him no, Sundays are family days and often coming home was for a quick bite to eat and then get changed and out visiting family or friends or heading to the beach.
I was totally shunned that I would be so mean to their precious (probably about the same age as Mr 7). Damnit, it was MY home and MY property and MY family and as this kid hung around ALL Saturday and wanted to eat and sleep at my place I wanted a break. I had 4 kids and between 10 and 1. I didn't need a self absorbed brat into the mix because he ALWAYS went home crying that I was mean to him or my son hit him or some other crap.
Just tell him that he may visit on certain days between certain hours. If he comes over any other time you will be calling the police as he will be trespassing. Your son may be a nice kid but being nice to a PITA 7 yr old gets old very quickly.
It's time to tell him flat
It's time to tell him flat out that he's being rude.
Answer the door, say "No, SS can't come play today" (no explanation!) and close the door. If he persists then you open it back up, tell him he's being incredibly rude and will either leave or else he will not be welcome ever again.