Something I've noticed
After reading I've noticed a common sentence from BMs: "we got along great until he started dating SM" or insert other version here....
I don't know about other readers here but when I read this tag I automatically think to myself that if y'all were getting along so hunky dory before SM then y'all probably wouldn't have divorced. He probably wouldn't be looking for a GF and would probably still want to be with you. Maybe it's just me and my experience but it's used a lot and I don't believe it. MOST**** of the time the relationship ends for a reason and MOST**** of the time the relationship does not improve once separated. I will never understand a BM who expects to be treated better after a relationship is over than when they were actually together. BM used to say how her and DH used to get along great before I came along; wrong they fought just as much then as they did while they were together and as much as they do now. But before she would always reference the past to incite guilt, he doesn't feel guilt anymore because he realizes that being with BM and fighting all the time is a joke of a life. She says she deserves respect because she is the mother of his child but will only dish out derrogatives for DH...but he should take it like the whipping boy he used to be according to her because well that's her version of "we got along great". It was great FOR HER.
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"we got along great before he
"we got along great before he stud acting SM" translation is "I use to be able to control him till he started dating SM. I miss that. I want to control him at all times!"
*started dating....(dang
*started dating....(dang ipad.)
The wife or girlfriend may
The wife or girlfriend may not be holding a gun to his head. But she shares his bed and THAT is a powerful motivator to keeping his woman happy
^this^ Jabba got what she
^this^ Jabba got what she wanted and DH got nothing but a hole in his bank account. I do acknowledge not all women are like this. I see working step families.
A guy I dated very briefly had an awesome ex wife. I actually really liked her and her me. He however was a true Disney dad. No bed times, junk food, all hours tv, excessive shopping, no boundaries. His ex W would tell me their daughter was exhausted after every weekend visit and was in bed asleep by 7pm on a Sunday night. Damn I liked that woman, him not so much.
It's true in my situation.
It's true in my situation. Them again, I didn't appreciate a psycho stalker invading my life, so there's that.
But we did co-parent very well before her, through several girlfriends he had. We weren't a good match as a couple, but could be friendly and raise or kids.
My husband and his wife get along just great.
Oh yes I am familiar with
Oh yes I am familiar with this, but in my case it was that DH was her chauffeur, handy man, doormat and someone she could just drop in on unannounced before I came along and put an end to that shit. DH hung out with her and the kids at her house because 1) he missed his kids and 2) he had nothing better to do. When I came along, suddenly the prospect of hanging out with his ex and her boyfriend, even if his kids were there, somehow wasn't as exciting of a prospect. Imagine that. I'm sure to hear BM tell it, I ruined everything, but sorry, I'm a sane gal who needs normal boundaries and I'll be damned if I'm gonna spend a Saturday afternoon at a BBQ with BM.
Yes XOSS stated at a family
Yes XOSS stated at a family counseling session (that counseling was a fraudulent and a joke) the things were fine with his mother "until dad married HER (meaning me)! Which is weird. I had ZERO to do with the woman. I did not interfere with ANYTHING. He did clarify when pressed that it wa only because his mother couldn't stand that his dad had remarried. So she was going to come after me.
At least he was honest. That boy, his brother and sister, mother and exH's unwillingness to defend me - it destroyed the marriage. She got what she wanted. I left and got a divorce. Maybe exH should just go back to BM and stop tormenting unsuspecting women.
Well I get along great with
Well I get along great with my ex husband. He's been remarried for two years and we still get along great. We never fought and I thought we were happy and in love but he's a serial cheater and I didn't want to end up with herpes. We had some trouble when I started dating again. And we had a little trouble when he first got with his now wife. My 6 year old had long hair. She took her to the salon and got it chopped all the way off without asking or telling. That made me mad but other than that its mostly been smooth sailing.
It's a script they practice
It's a script they practice on others frequently so they can say it and sound reasonably honest in family court to blame everything on the Step.
Don't you know? The ex is
Don't you know? The ex is supposed to move on and be happy but you're supposed to stay alone and be lonely and miserable. BM started whoring around before the ink was dry on the divorce papers but DH starts dating me A YEAR after and it's nothing but bullshit and bitterness. She didn't want him, but she didn't want anyone else to have him either. Ugh, hypocrite.