Adult SS 35 contacts H after 1 year refusal to talk. He is calling he says on behalf of his sister SD 33 because his BD did not call SD 33 on her birthday! H tells him that no he had not because SD 33 had refused to talk to him since last year and had actually told him she liked things better without having to "deal" with him! SS went off again on his dad blaming him for things that had gone on during their childhood such as why he had not tried to see them more and since he did not get H's inheritance (adult skids did recieve some property that other cousins and his minor half sisters did not recieve), and other tired old storylines. Basically the gist was H did not do enough for them then and H does not do enough now!!!!

H has had this discussion with these so called "adult" Skids multiple times since they have reached their late 20s (regarding how BM had refused acess to them when they were little and how BM made his EOWE vitation as miserable as possible) yet they must have short term memory loss because they keep bringing it up!

H also told SS 35 that neither of them - skids- ever told him happy birthday either. SS 35 has the audacity to tell him that he doesn't even know what his brithday is as though that is an excuse!!!!!! Shades of narcistic behavior????

SS 35 seemed eager to convince H of a few things in this conversation:
1. His refusal to talk to his father was not all about money - despite all of his prior behavior and statements, and demands to be told what H recieved;
2. He loves our minor BDs! (never showed any interest or spent any time talking to them before the inheritance issue and has on several recent incidences said that he was jealous of them);
3. H owed him for being lacking during both his childhood and adult hood.
4. SS 35 was really only angry (for the past two years which ironically began within weeks of his discovering that he was not getting any of H's small inheritance) because two christmas's ago we had dared to give both he and his sister money for Christmas and H had signed the card with everyone's name on it without getting minor Bds and myself to sign it and we had given small purchased gifts (cost of which was much much less than the money given to Skids)to close family friends!!!!!!!!! How dare we!!!!!

NO apology was offered in this conversation or the subsequent conversation that occured for his past horrible behavior to H or to me for names and comments that were made about me.

I think that his realizing that H was no longer chasing after them finally hit home that they - skids - may have overplayed thier hand. I think he was trying to regain control so that he could get H to continue to jump back up on his hamster wheel chasing after them - doing whatever it takes to appease them in the off chance that they might talk to him!

In a subsequent phone call with SS - H informed him what I had ponted out about SS 35's continued display of hypocrisy! H confronted SS about his always giving our minor BDs money as gifts - never spending the time or effort to buy them a gift? Also didn't this money and card usually come from SD 33 as SS 35 never could seem to even get that together so minor BDs card were actually never sgned by him but instead was signed on his behalf by SD????? H also pointed out that both skids had told us a few years earlier that they preferred money as gifts??? SS 35 replied to this that that had been true at the time!!!!!!!!

SS 35 was confronted with his trumped up lies and yet SS 35 still did not apolgize to H or admit that what he was now saying was the cause for all of the anger was garbage!!!

H finally told SS 35 that if he wanted to have an adult relationship with him that they needed to start over and stop dwelling on the past - find common ground.

After a discussionwith me after thsi last phone call H agreed that he did not blame me if I was done with Skids because of the ugly way they have acted and thier other questioable behavior and all of the ugly things they have said. He agrees that we need to have little if any contact with our minir BDs because minor BDs had been hurt by them so badly in all of this. As a result of thier past behavior H has agreed to keep his realtionship with adult skids seperate from our immediate family.

I will update later regarding what BM did to my minor BD that I just found out about.