NCP should have rights too! Your married to DH so there is no legal trouble that you can get into taking sd with you as long as it is during DH visitation and he is aware of your taking her, where your going and ability to communicate with sd while in your care...would be just like putting her in daycare while he was working. However, make sure there is nothing in divorce decree that states sd must remain in DH care only during all visitations and that if you are going out of state there is nothing stating that Dh must have bm permission or give her notification of such before taking sd there.If sd doesnt want to go on vacation with you, I would not push the issue, find alternative care for the time DH is working( babysitter, daycare ect...) until DH comes home...As to weather your phone is gonna blow up, I would not only anticipate it but expect it weather sd goes on vacation with you willingly or if made to go. And I personally would expect it if sd stays and has to go to babysitter or daycare as well....nothing in this situation is going to be good enough for BM and the threats will come agian....but you know that already. As far as will the courts listen to 10y/o if she doesnt want to come to visitations any longer.. Really depends on the judge but more often than not they will not hear a child unless there is a bases to hear the child like DFCS is involved due to neglect or abuse ect.The age when most states give the child a voice in court is usually between 13 and 14, but you would have to check with your local magistrate court to know for sure.

You shouldn't get into any legal trouble, but I'm sure BM won't let you hear the end of it depending on how ridiculous she is. I went on a week-long vacation with just my stepmother and me when I was 14 or 15. I had a blast and it was really a bonding experience for us. But depending on your situation, things might be totally different. I'll tell you right now I know that if I ever asked to take SS on vacation with me without BF present, BM would have me in court like *that*. Hell, she doesn't even want us BOTH taking him out of the city we live in, and freaks out every holiday because she's terrified we'll take him to visit my parents with us who live out of the state.

Have you run this by BM or DH? What does he think about it?

*~So sayeth Nymh~*

Run it by BM and if she freaks, it might not be worth it, but if she's cool with it, it will be a great bonding time for you, SD and your family. Very important, in my experience. I've taken my SD on shorter vacations (she's younger, though), and yes, sometimes it was awkward, but all good stuff for us (SD + me) to work through.