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Clingy stepson

Kmorgan24's picture

Submitted by Kmorgan24 on Sat, 01/30/2021 - 10:02am

Ok my fiancé has a 3 year old son which I have been in his life when he was about 2. Anyways year and a half later I'm pregnant. We have a little girl who is 1 now. So my fiancé wasn't around for the 1st year of his sons life due to BM. 5 months into us dating right when we find out I'm pregnant BM wants to "co parent" all of a sudden. I was excited for my fiancé since I know how hard it was to not see his son often. The first 6 month of "co parenting" we're hell. So I knew she basically wanted my fiancé back and would text him dumb stuff late at night but luckily my fiancé didn't want her back since she's a huge liar and manipulator. At the beginning I loved my fiancé's son he was such a sweet kid. But Ihe is almost 4 now and I've been noticing he is getting some of his moms characteristics. He is a huge manipulater. And he clings way to much to me which I can't handle cuz I have my own daughter who is clingy to me. He also can never be "alone" I go use the bathroom has to come right in ( if it was my own kid it would be different) I've set boundaries with him about knocking before coming in or not coming into the bedroom while I get dressed but it goes through one ear and out the other. So I'm basically the stay at home mom and we have my SS half of the time and I think that's why I've grown so much resentment cuz he isn't my child yet I watch him more than his mom and dad combined. My biggest thing is that he talks soooo much even when I ask him nicely to be quiet cuz I'm on the phone or something he still continues to try to talk to me. His mom babies him too which drives me up the wall like if he gets in trouble and is crying in timeout she will go sit with him the entire time until he calms down. Sorry but I don't have time for that I have another kid. I've tried to like him but he starts talking or being annoying and I just want to gouge my eyes out. I'm like go ask your dad I'm not your parent. He's really good with my daughter but I won't lie it makes me nervous the older he gets and how manipulative he becomes. 

Comments

Harry's picture

Submitted by Harry on Sat, 01/30/2021 - 10:30am

But you must stand up for yourself.  You are not the mother,or babysitter.   If DH wants his DS 50/50. He must either take care of him or get child care.   Not you.   DH going to be upset because you don't want the big Happy Family.

So someone is going to be upset.  you or DH.  If DH actually tales care of his DS that one thing. But he's not. 
so your upeset. If you don't do anything nothing is going to change

thinkthrice's picture

Submitted by thinkthrice on Sat, 01/30/2021 - 11:26am

"when we find out I'm pregnant BM wants to "co parent" all of a sudden"

Translation: BM is ready to amp up her PAS plan for SS. (which includes coddling and emotionally hobbling SS so that he returns to infancy)

Dogmom1321's picture

Submitted by Dogmom1321 on Sat, 01/30/2021 - 6:35pm

*SAME HERE* BM has made our lives hell for about 4 years. Weeks after she found out I was pregnant she wanted to apologize immediately, say congrats, and "co parent". Fast forward 3 months later, the PAS is underway. She has brainwashed SD10 into telling her "Your Dad doesn't love you anymore" and of course now she wants to go live with her full time. It hurts DH, but at this point with all of the drama, I say good riddance.