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Russian-roulette for skids appearance at holidays

ITB2012's picture

Submitted by ITB2012 on Tue, 11/26/2019 - 10:06am

I am picking up DS for Thanksgiving. OSS is almost on the way but I realized no one mentioned him at all when I said I was doing the DS pick up. No idea if he's got a ride or BM is getting him or he's not coming home for the holiday. DH hasn't mentioned him at all. (There's also a big storm coming that could impede OSS from getting home if he's waiting to leave.)

I've mentioned that DS is coming home but spending the t-day with XH. DH has said boo about either skid. I don't know if he knows or if he doesn't know if they are coming over. I don't care. I always make too much so there will be plenty.

This is how my life goes, I have no idea if the skids are making an appearance and it's usually because DH has not talked to his own kids about it. I'm sure Xmas will be this way, too. So, I go on my merry way making plans and DH and the skids will just have to fit into them or not.

It's almost like DH has totally given up on seeing his kids now that OSS is at college and YSS has a part-time job.

 

Comments

Harry's picture

Submitted by Harry on Tue, 11/26/2019 - 10:56am

If SK show up, it's on DH to parent them. If it does not fit into your schedule, not your problem.  He did not give you a heads up.  It's on him

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Submitted by Aniki-Moderator on Tue, 11/26/2019 - 1:47pm

Expect the best; prepare for the worst. If skids show up, do your own thing and let your DH entertain them.

MisplacedMom's picture

Submitted by MisplacedMom on Tue, 11/26/2019 - 1:54pm

So it's not just our family? I finally caved today and asked my DH what the plan was.  He doesn't know, and I'm usually the one who pushes making plans.  I am NOT doing that this year, so it will be interesting to see what actually happens.  I'm hoping the end result of the lack planning is a very peaceful (read- SK free) holiday for me and mine.  CO says alternating holidays, but has only been officially in place about 8 months.  BM is ghosting DH since I began refusing to take SS when DH is out of town.  Soooo.... Roulette for me as well! Drinks

Siemprematahari's picture

Submitted by Siemprematahari on Tue, 11/26/2019 - 2:16pm

OP just do your thing and to hell with everything else. Create your own schedule and if step kids come ok, if not that's even better. Your H will have to deal with HIS lack of communication and parenting when it comes to his kids. Don't stress yourself over people you have no control over. Just make sure you enjoy your holiday and to heck with everyone else.

ITB2012's picture

Submitted by ITB2012 on Wed, 11/27/2019 - 11:23am

In my post I said: So, I go on my merry way making plans and DH and the skids will just have to fit into them or not.

I still have not heard from DH if they are coming. Even DS mentioned yesterday when I picked him up how terrible OSS has been about getting back to him if he, DS, is the one to initiate contact. DS tried to find out OSSs plans for the holiday and was going to invite him to do something but since OSS hasn't responded, DS moved on to other people.

Not a problem. More turkey leftovers for me!