More dramas with SD14. I actually thought things had quietened down…WRONG!!

Got home last week and SO tells me that apparently, SD14 is interstate. I was like….”aaandd..??” ‘cos..she hadn’t visited in 2 years, was rejecting his calls..refusing to return emails etc. She tried cutting herself after a fight with BM and conclusion was that this was just an attention ploy on her behalf. So..BM rewards her by sending her off interstate (5 days off school), to hang with her family. Anyway..I didn’t understand why this should concern us..as we pretty much have not had anything to do with her for 2 years.

This news came from SO’s Mom..who is still meddling and trying to convince SO to “fix” SD14’s attitude. Woman can’t seem to comprehend that there is nothing we can do while BM fully supports her attitude 100% and is on a mission to ensure SO is hated and kept completely out of the picture when it comes to SD.

Anyway.. PTA is coming up and SO decides that he’s going to ask for a copy of her report. I knew this wasn’t gonna be good, ‘cos last year, when we went to the PTA for both SS and SD, BM was there and was openly hostile to SO. To the point where SS13 was very stressed out. At this PTA, when it came time to discuss SD.. BM told SO “you can leave now – we’re about to talk about SD”. SO didn’t want to cause any dramas..so we left.

Now, I believe SO and his Mom have been talking about this and I also believe that she has guilted SO into doing “something” about the whole situation. SO rang the school to ask them to send a copy of SD14’s report to him. Their response?
“well..Mr SO..unfortunately, we have been requested by SD and BM NOT to send you a copy of her report. As SD is “high risk” (due to her attempted cutting), we have to abide by their decision”. SO told them he was her Father and as such, had a right to view her report. They insisted that no, they weren’t going to go against BM’s wishes. There is no CO so there was nothing SO could do.

Well. SO contacted a family lawyer and was told that, due to SD almost turning 15 (in Sept), he pretty much had no rights. If SO wanted, he could attempt to go to court, but as SD refuses to have anything to do with him..this might be a waste of time. That a judge would allow a 15 year old to choose. If SO was determined to fight it..then he’d better be prepared for a mediator to liaise between SO and SD as well as BM.

SD14 used to be a mini-wife to SO and still believes that she and only she should be the one SO is closest to. She also still feels that she should be held in a higher regard than her brother and treated as such. She feels betrayed by SO and abandoned, since he began his relationship with me (after 6 years of being single). SS13, who was raised exactly the same as SD..loves his dad unconditionally and just wants him to be happy. SS13 has adapted well to us all..continues to visit us on his allocated weekends and is doing exceptionally well at school. A genuinely decent kid.

I friggin’ told SO 2 years ago to go get a goddamn court order to stop this nonsense. He didn’t listen to me then..and now..shit’s starting all over again..how. friggin. fantastic.