Gigi82's Blog
My blood is boiling right now. SD just told DH that BM reads her all of the emails from him.
5 days into our summer visitation with SD7 and the shit has already hit the fan. The minute that BM realized that she couldn't be 100% in control she flipped out. DH has already received 2 nasty emails, criticizing his parenting skills, and accusing him of stealing the charger to the stupid phone that she insisted their 7 year old needed for her visit. Why the hell would he steal or hide a charger? If he were going to steal or hide something it would be that freaking phone!
Update on the stupid phone situation.
SD7 came for her summer visit with the phone as promised. My DH always picks her up alone because I don't want anything to do with BM or her crazy mom. 10 minutes into the drive to our hotel, SD had already made and received 5 phone calls! She was so excited about the phone, what little girl wouldn't be? We had a long drive, over 10 hours to our state, so DH and I decided to let her have free reign of the phone during the trip. BIG MISTAKE. That first day there were 48 freaking phone calls made and received, between BM, BM's mom, BM's sister, and BM's boyfriend. 48 phone calls!
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Should 7 year olds have cell phones?
BM bought SD7 a cell phone to bring with her for summer visitation. Of course she never discussed this with DH, and only emailed the day before about it just to inform him that it was not to be taken away from SD. So now he looks like the bad guy if he were to take it away or put restrictions on it. It’s not like we don’t let SD call her mom any time she wants, and we don’t deny calls from her mother, even though 4 out of 5 weekly calls get denied when he tries to contact her. SD has already been taught that she has to remember to call BM every night before bed, or she will get in trouble.
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Real Love. Wish BM could understand this....
Love
(real love, the kind that can make a stepfamily survive and succeed):
• is patient
• is kind
• does not envy
• does not boast
• is not proud
• is not rude
• is not self-seeking
• is not easily angered
• keeps no record of wrongs
• does not delight in evil
• rejoices with the truth
• always protects
• always trusts
• always hopes
• always perseveres
1Cor. 13:4-7
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Should BM tell DH about upcoming doctors and dentist appointments?
CO says that BM provides insurance and DH pays half of all bills not covered. We have no problem with this. This is something that was agreed to while they were mediating, but it seems like BM is abusing it. She apparently has switched jobs and does not have SD7 insured anymore even though she is supposed to. We have been getting bills presented to DH by BM's mother every other weekend for a few months now. He is supposed to pay these balances within one month, but it's really starting to piss me off.
7 year old making racist comments. It’s going to be a long 5 weeks!
So we finally get to bring SD7 to our state for 5 weeks this summer. Her mother has tried everything over the past 5 years to keep DH from his child, and succeeded for the most part. PAS is rampant in this poor little girl, she is constantly repeating horrible things that both her mother and grandmother tell her about her dad. That is to be expected when dealing with a psycho ex of this caliber, but BM’s hate and negativity is obviously way beyond her contempt for my DH. At 7, SD already expresses her entitlement issues, and has that prissy attitude like she might be better than others.
Found this on an Aussie PAS website, really good tips for what you shouldn't do when dealing with an alienating parent.
what ever you do, you must not ...
Do not denigrate your ex in front of or to the children, this should have already been the case anyway, but now it is even more important. I personally believe that you should not build the ex up to the children either, as this may be seen as you confirming to the children that the ex is wise and correct, and indirectly, that they in fact should believe in what the ex is saying. Remain neutral in the children's minds.
Freaking out!
Okay my DH and I are finally getting SD7 for the first time ever in our state until the end of summer. BM is the mayor of Crazy Town, and I am freaking out about what she might do or accuse us of. She has her lawyer on speed dial and we are tired of going to court. I have a million questions running through my head about what would or wouldn’t raise BM’s craziness levels. If you all want to answer a few of the questions I would appreciate it, if not it just feels good for me to write it down.
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SD finally coming for the summer, sooo nervous.
DH has been in a custody battle for 5 years now. He's faced false allegations and an insane BM doing everything in her power to stop him from being a part of his life. Now SD7 is finally coming home with us for the rest of the summer. This is what I've prayed, cried, wished and hoped for since I met him 4 years ago. The problem is, now that it's finally happening we are terrified of what BM might try to pull now that she will be losing part of her control.
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SD7 tells Dh last night that she doesn't want to come to visit, BM told her she didn' t have to.
My DH has been fighting for several years to be a part of his DD7's life since his divorce with her mom. 5 years he has had to deal with false allegations, his daughter being withheld from him, and harassment from her family towards him and even me since I entered the picture 4 years ago. Now he has finally gotten his psycho BM to agree to a custody schedule that involves eow and 5 weeks in the summer. They agreed on this two months ago, but she has yet to sign the paperwork. Now we are worried that SD7 will not be up to our state this summer, once again.