Am i being too hard?

SS got a super speeder ticket last week. He's 17 and 1/2. It causes a lot of discord with my husband when it comes to the appropriate disciplany action. He is passive agressive. I'm the disciplinary of the house. Finally, he hurt my feelings so bad, by stating that I always think I'm right about everything.

Since then, We hardly speak..... Am I being too hard?

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I agree with the other

I agree with the other posters with the course of action that should be taken. Also, if your H feels " you think you're right about everything" than let him deal with disciplining his son and remove yourself from the equation. I'd also ask him to be more specific when he states that. Why does he feel that way?

I did tell him that i was

I did tell him that i was removing myself from any further disciplinary action when it comes to SS, but that has caused distance between us. My son is also 17, but has not given us any problems as my SS other than not picking up his room and having to stay on him for homework. SS has done some pretty bad stuff over the last few months. found him and GF in my house on the couch, not doing anything (yet) when i especifically asked him not to have anyone over..... last year he punched out the window out of school bus..... I hate that this is causing me and my husband not to communicate. We have such aloving relationship otherwise... urgh but is hard for me to stay quiet.......

Wait. Back-up. Did you just

Wait. Back-up. Did you just write this teen punched out a window on the school bus last school year?

Now the teen is recklessly driving own the road in a car provided by Dad/you? You hand out a very mild consequence and your DH thinks you are being too hard?

I guess I am the meanest Mom ever (as my children often told me, lol) as this kid would not have any driving privileges nor paid for vehicle insurance until and/or less he was able to afford his own , all on his own. And if kid didn't have the cash for this ticket sitting in the bank to pay the fine, he would be my manual labor around the home and yard until he earned the cash to do so. I like to tie the consequence to the offense, so my handed out penalty would center around the driving. I'd let him keep the phone so he could call friends for a ride, lol.

Your husband's son.. he can

Your husband's son.. he can do the discipline. Now, if the car is in your name.. you can refuse to allow the boy to drive it.

punishment is for SS to pay

punishment is for SS to pay for ticket. and six months differencial if insurance goes up. H took phone away for two weeks at night.

That is a totally realistic

That is a totally realistic punnishment and a lot less than I would give and would have been given as a teen.

If he can, make him ride the

If he can, make him ride the shcool bus too. Social humiliation is good too at that age. Worked for me! LOL

This is a kid who punch out a bus window

Not a normal kid. By any means. Not many bus windows get punched out. Of course he will have to pay for the ticket. And insurance will go up for three to five YEARS. Not six months. At 17YO male the insurance is going up a lot. Like $1000 s . This kid would not be driving for like three to six months. Remember if it’s your or DH car. And he kills someone. You will lose everything home, saving,ect

I agree. This would be a huge

I agree. This would be a huge deal if it happened with my sons. Increase will probably be significant. And will affect rates for much longer than 6 months.

If it happened with one of my kids, they would no longer be on my policy and would have to obtain their own policy (and pay for it). After not being able to drive for AT LEAST a month.

Also, I think I would find some lame driving class for him to attend (and pay for). Scheduled for the weekend, of course! Sorry no friends.

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