confused stepmother.
Hi everyone! Im kind of lost in this forum. Is the first time I post, so please forgive me for any mistakes I make.
I am in a relationship with a man that have 3 kids. Two girls 16nand 15byears old and a boy 6 ywars old. We've been together for the past three years. His kids live out of state and visit every summer. They will be here soon. But my the question I have is about something else.
His 16 years old is very close to him. I learned how to deal with it somehow. But since last december she is afting weird.She start calling her father every day more than 10 times a day. At the beginning I didnt say anything. But it came to a point that it start3d bothrring me.if he is in the bathroom and she calls he would ignore the call but she keeps calling every minute until he answers. When he does she ask why you are not picking up, whqt are you doing. He tells her im in the bathroom I will call you back and she calls right back in less than a minute.
we cant even hold an entire conversation with out her calling. He works nights, when he gets home I leave and go to work I rush back so I can cook and spend at least an hour with him before he leaves. But 30 minutes out of that hour she is calling,
He works on the road, so he calls me at night we are talking five minutes and there she is calling again.
Weekends she starts caloing early when we still on bed. If we go out and she calls he would say I will call you later and she start asking why. Dont hang up on me and start calling back.
This is out of control. This afternoon I came home a few hours earlier. He was relaxing a little bit before hitting the road. He asked me to lay on bed with him for a while and I did. She start calling he ignored her, she kept calling and calling so he picked up. She started questioning him. He told her he was bisy, and she said ok do what you have to do I will stay here waiting. He said I am going to the bathroom, she insisted she will stay on the line. Finnalky he hanged up and I told him please forgive me for what I am about to say but your daughter is obsessed with you. This is sick and I am getting tired of it. You better start putting limits before it gets out of control. And then I mention him a situation about q famiky I know that the daughter was acting similar to his and ended up taking her clothes out in front of her father and fiancee. Maybe I went to far with that comment. But the way she tqlks to him. The conv3rsations she have makes me think something is really wrong there. Please give me some advice
I cant tqke this anymore. I love him but I am sick of his daughter and the wqy she acts. And he doesnt stop it. Even his mother that came to spend three weeks with us was sick of it. And she was the first person who said the word obsession here.
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Thanks for replying. Her
Thanks for replying. Her mother start a relationship a few months ago. Her mother and my husband are divorced
Since 2002.
He tells his daughter I will call you back. And he always answer because he feels guilty if he doesnt.
she's tough with her father, but she is always feeling sorry for her mother. Another thing is her mother doesnt
work. She says she decided to raise her kids and stay home. My husband covers everything. Beside child support
he pays cell phones and buy them clothes the whole year. Pays for school clothes and everything they
need. And this same girl is always demanding more. The 15 years old is different and we get along very well
is the oldest one that is always trying to give him a hard time. She even make up stories and make their parenta
fight on the phone and yell at each other. When they calm down and talk they find out their daughter was exageraying
things.
I have kids and I am divorced. But I would never leavee my kids get into their fathers live like that.
Thanks for your advice. Today
Thanks for your advice. Today she havent call. I didnt asked him because I dont want
to be talking about her the hour we spent together before he goes to work. I know he talked
to her yesterday and she told him she gets anxiety and thatbos why she calls.
She is going to a psychiatrist every month. Because when things are not done her way
she starts hitting the walls with her head.
When she is in trouble and is going to be grounded she claims she hear voices telling her
to hurt herself. But specialist cant find anything wrong.
After her father separated from her mother he never introduce any women he met
to his kids. I am the first one. And it only happen when we had a stable relationship.
A few weeks ago he got a new car, and the car he had he told ne to keep it and keep paying
it for the next two years. When she qsked about the car he had and he told him I got it
she went crazy, saying that is not fair that I have a new car and her mother dont.
He said, tell your mother to get a job and she can afford a new car. Because my wife
is going to make the payments on this one because she works. Just to make it clear, she never
worked. We split expenses here. Even though he makes in one week what I make in a month
but I like to have my pwn money.
she might be jealous but what she dont see is that when he is away and they need something
I am the one who have to stop what I am doing to go send them clothes or money, or shampoo
and conditioner or the most stupid things you can imagine, they ask their father to send
by mail.
before was worst he would spent all he had on them. Bit when we start going out
he leqrned that I have happy kids and I only give them what I cann afford. He give his kids
his kids everything they want and they still unhappy so he stopped a little bit.
His mother is on my side, she knows how hard I work (I am a housekeeper) and
I am smart using the money I make. And she wants me to get my husband on the same roas
so we can have a better future.
Going bqck to my sd she would have a different story everyday. Somadays she would
Call saying she is lesbian. The next day she would say she likes a boy but he ignores her.
I think she just want something to talk about. But for me is sick!
Hwe wont do any ofnthose things you suggest because thatbis his baby. Thats his answer.
I tried everything. He will
I tried everything. He will not stop this situation. I wish I knew how she was before.
I wouldnt be here now. I dont need this in my life. Now I understand why he never
had a relationship too long. He even told me that if she never finds a man he is going
to take care of her forever. So I guess is time for a plan b. Walking away from all this
bs.