MENTAL:)
Background: Have waited all my life for a man like I have now. We met almost 2 years ago, and have been living together 9 months. I moved a state away to be with him. I know he will ask me to marry him, he's been talking about it since our 2nd date:) Before I moved we could take turns driving across state to see each other every 2 weeks. I have 1 BD-18, he has 2BS-18 & 23, and 1BD-24. His wife passed away 10 years ago. I am his first serious relationship since her death.
We got along fairly well, however, knowing she would resent me anyway just because her mother is gone; I didn't push anything. She has always lived with her father except briefly lived with her grandmother(mom's mother). She works part-time, and did go to college like over 4 years ago, but didn't do well and got put on financial probation. She hasn't gone back. The agreement between her and father was she would live here free and all she needed to do was help keep house clean and go to college and have part time job. So, she's had 6 years to get her life together and advance it.
Current: Lived here 9 months now. All my stuff is still in storage. I thought it would be easier on her to do it that way. Everything is where she puts it/or has it; or she gets mad. In fact, my stuff gets moved; what little objects I do have. ((Now I'm so mad that I rearranged the livingroom today)) The family pictures are in livingroom, including those of her mother and father together. And that doesn't bother me...it really doesn't....she's gone..not an ex.
The SD is the major issue. Him and I get along great and we have kept it together despite all I've been through...only because I keep my mouth shut.
HOW DO I GET HER TO MOVE????????
She has done so much I don't know where to begin really....so I think will continue this in another blog note 
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Comments
She will NEVER move until her
She will NEVER move until her dad forces her to, in my opinion. She is probably going to get worse, and if you get married, watch out.
I moved in with my boyfriend only after he promised me his kids would never move in here. They are 18, 19, and 22. The daughter (22) is the worst, as she is extremely nasty, aggressive, and a huge bully. She was rarely involved in my bf's life, but when he bought this house, she immediately began emailing and texting. She wanted to live here, bc she had gotten thrown out of her grandma's house, and then a friends. She cannot get along with anyone, as she is so hateful. She came here, and ignored me, or shot me dirty looks. She refuses to work full-time, and seriously expects to be supported her whole life. Wont go to school, or look for a better job or take more hours. Had she moved in, she would have sat on the couch eating and playing on the computer all day. My bf's sons are the same way, the laziness and entitlement is disgusting. This is why I knew I could not live with them.
You need to have a talk with your bf, and he needs to establish a plan to get her out on her own. Also, she does not have to like you, but she has to respect you, and he needs to enforce that in your home. My bf's kids have gotten so bad, that I wont allow them in here. They don't want anything to do with him, unless he gives them money. If he wants to see him, they can go someplace. Until I am given respect, they are not welcome here.
The sooner you talk with your bf, the better. In my case, the brats get worse each day.
Thanks for your reply. I
Thanks for your reply. I agree with you that it's up to her father to get her out. In fact, his son, girlfriend, and my BD now have moved into an apt together. So, of course, that is what the SD wanted. But I wanted to get my daughter out cause his threatened to 'put her in the ground'. He told me the other day that he took her to a small one bedroom 'guest house' type place and she said it was small, but could work. Then he also told me he could come up with some money for a down payment for a house for her and I was appalled!!! Told him I totally disagreed with that one, as she never been on her own and doesn't even know how to budget!! I haven't heard anymore on that one. I think it's been put on the backburner since the other kids are gone.
I'm almost scared to talk to him about SD having to move. I'm scared he will resent me for it.
Should I start bringing my stuff into the house? I'm wondering if that will hasten things...aren't I bad?
I agree!!!!! The only thing
I agree!!!!! The only thing I would be concerned about-do you think she would steal or damage any of your belongings? If you have extra special stuff, I would keep it in your locked bedroom. But, you really need to show her this is YOUR home now. Bring the stuff in, and put it where you want to.
Thank you guys so much for
Thank you guys so much for your help! I don't think she would be destructive....but not sure. I will keep extra special stuff put up. We will see
LOL...I already do hide
LOL...I already do hide stuff. Have to if I want anything.