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no more mr nice guy

dynodon's picture

Submitted by dynodon on Thu, 01/07/2021 - 11:02pm

im 100% service connected veteran served in viet nam and have ptsd and aggitated depression i have 3 stepsons and been married to my wife for 37 years got my oldest stepson out of jail a year ago hes been living with us ever since he is severily enabled by my wife he is an expert freeloader and can dream up some plots to live without working.his latest one is to live with me and my wife and take care of us in our later years.of course he don't have a penny to his name me and my wife have ssi checks and i have a disability check for iujuries in vietnam.the other day i heard through the grapevine that he has an 8 year old illagitamate son that he plans to get.Am i stupied ialmost had a heartattack when i learned this.i was born dirt poor in a shotgun house in a cottonpatch and worked hard for every penny i have and nevered borrowed any money eccept from a bank and paid it back with interest.so i told my wife if that is what she wanted we would split everything 50-50 and go our own way So she said no he would move so i am now waiting but not very long because i have to have privacy at 74 years old.

Comments

JRI's picture

Submitted by JRI on Thu, 01/07/2021 - 11:37pm

I'm near your age and feel the same.  My granddaughter is visiting our city and asked to stay here with boyfriend and large dog for "awhile" as he looks for a job.  Long story short, no, thats not happening, they are staying elsewhere.  My DH83 is going thru some physical issues and we just cant handle other people here right now.

dynodon's picture

Submitted by dynodon on Fri, 01/08/2021 - 9:21am

im loving my peace and quiet and im not bothering anybody and im not asking for peace and quiet im demanding it and willing to live with the consiquinces to get it i love the understanding i haven't been getting.

Wicked stepmo.'s picture

Submitted by Wicked stepmo. on Fri, 01/08/2021 - 2:59am

Good for you, you deserve to be able to enjoy your life and not have to worry about taking care of adult children. Especially one who sounds like he enjoys being a mooch.

dynodon's picture

Submitted by dynodon on Fri, 01/08/2021 - 9:32am

im mad at myself for not being demanding it only showed weakness and people don't respect weakness.its a stuiped world we live in

Winterglow's picture

Submitted by Winterglow on Fri, 01/08/2021 - 3:40am

I think you should go one step further and tell your wife that if he isn't out pronto he will be legally evicted. Then head to the courthouse to get the necessary papers and information.

dynodon's picture

Submitted by dynodon on Fri, 01/08/2021 - 9:39am

i thold my wife anytime she thinks she made the worng choice of living with me or her son to let me know and we will take 50-50 and go on with our lives and choices.

tog redux's picture

Submitted by tog redux on Fri, 01/08/2021 - 7:17am

Good for you, set some limits. It's not your job to take care of her grown son and his child, and don't put yourself through that. You have enough to contend with without adding that burden to your life.

dynodon's picture

Submitted by dynodon on Fri, 01/08/2021 - 9:44am

it funny how people make plans that include me and don't even tell me. i don' recall ever doing that.

Rumplestiltskin's picture

Submitted by Rumplestiltskin on Fri, 01/08/2021 - 10:02am

I agree. If i can't have peace and quiet when I'm 74, i'm moving to a cabin in the woods by myself!

Harry's picture

Submitted by Harry on Fri, 01/08/2021 - 12:28pm

And let her support her DS and GK bu herself.   She it making the choice to support her child not you.  Hope they are happy 

dynodon's picture

Submitted by dynodon on Sat, 01/23/2021 - 9:06am

 I drew a line in the sand and I told my wife me and her son have total differenceces of opinion and that I love her, But#### if she will sacrafice my mental health over any of her sons that we will divorce split up 50/50 and go our own ways and live with our choices. He has been gone for 2 weeks and I feel better, and anybody else comes in second, but the offer stands for divorce  for everyones benefit.

dynodon's picture

Submitted by dynodon on Sat, 01/30/2021 - 4:10pm

my wife already told me she is missing her son comming over all the time.I think i should get a divorce what do you think.