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Drac0's picture

Submitted by Drac0 on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 9:09am

All privileges, shore leaves, play times, R&R and the Nutella jar have been pulled.

I walked into work this morning with a bag full of stuff and dumped it on my desk. My cubicle mates (who know the problems SS is having) saw the pile and couldn’t help but laugh.

“So Drac0! Did you have a nice time last night? LOL”

Yeah, last night didn’t go well (not that I was expecting it to go smoothly). DW was pleading with me to “hold off” until she could talk to the teachers. I told her no. I warned her and I warned SS of what I was going to do, and I am a man of my word. My only regret is that I didn’t do it sooner.

And I repeated my commitment. “I refuse to be stuck with an 18-year-old high school drop out, sitting around the house all day doing nothing but play video games and eating Nutella sandwiches.”

DW tried to defend SS. Every point she brought up I shot down.

“But SS needs tutoring!”
"Yes, but the main problem is SS doesn’t study."

"But SS does study."
"He doesn’t study enough."

"He has problems with his science teacher."
"Oh. the same teacher that said SS stands up and amuses the class by speaking in a squeaky voice. Yes, I can see why the science teacher would have a problem with the class clown."

"But SS has improved overall!"
"He still failed TWO classes."

"But if we punish him, he will just give up."
"Then it’s time you consider military school."

"You would not send your OWN son to military school!"
"Oh yes I would! My daughter too if she was pulling this crap!"

"You just want to beat your chest to prove you are the man of the house!"
"And you are just desperately searching for excuses to prevent me from doing what needs to be done."

DW stopped talking to me for a while. She went to talk to SS to get his 'version' of what happened.

SS had nothing to say. He just shrugged his shoulders and said "I dunno". He wasn't shocked at the two failures on his report card.

"SS"...DW said. "Please be honest with me. Are you AT ALL surprised at these results?"

"Hrmmm....Well....no. Not really."

"And what do you think you need to do to get better grades?"

"Urm...I dunno....Study more I guess? Play less video games?"

Comments

Drac0's picture

Submitted by Drac0 on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 9:25am

Dang! Seems I am being a victim of my own punishment.

I can't access the site from work.

DarkStar's picture

Submitted by DarkStar on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 9:38am

Mad applause for Draco!!!!!

It's really sad that SS seems to be more self-aware than his mother. Granted, he doesn't CARE, but he knows he's a slacker.
It's frustrating that DW doesn't even realize that her love goggles are the main impediment in your SS's success.

Would your DW ever consider counseling? I realize that she would have to at first admit that her emotional enmeshment with her son is unhealthy.....but, until she sees the light, I think this is going to continue to be an uphill battle.

You took all of SS's stuff to work so that DW can't crumble and give them back, right?

Drac0's picture

Submitted by Drac0 on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 9:56am

>You took all of SS's stuff to work so that DW can't crumble and give them back, right?<

Actually it’s mostly to prevent SS from playing with it when he is left home alone. He is the last one to leave the house and the first one to arrive home. So if I leave the stuff home, SS will definetly try to squeeze in some e-binkie time before any of us come home.

It’s actually happened. I came home early once (last year) to catch SS playing on his iPad. When I confronted him, he actually had the gall to tell me “Oh. I forgot I was punished”.

But yes, with the gadgets at work there is less of a chance of SS trying to get DW to crumble. DW actually has a good out if this happens. “Don’t ask me. Ask Drac0. He is the one that has your stuff”.

StepKat's picture

Submitted by StepKat on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 9:58am

"e-binkie" Oh yes!!!!!! I'm so using this term from now on to describe SS10's dependence on electronics and video games.

Tuff Noogies's picture

Submitted by Tuff Noogies on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 9:49am

"You just want to beat your chest to prove you are the man of the house!" WTF???? REALLY????? um, Mrs. Draco- HE IS. *smdh*

bravo, D. how ironic that even ss acknowledges how right you have been all along. maybe your dw will finally see that her making excuses for him is hurting him far more than helping.

Drac0's picture

Submitted by Drac0 on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 10:02am

The way SS has been acting for the last TWO WEEKS was a clear indication that he knew this was coming!

From the moment he said, "I want to spend Spring Break with Dad". I KNEW it was to avoid ground zero at our house.

Drac0's picture

Submitted by Drac0 on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 10:42am

Funny I was talking to Rutherford about that in a PM just now.

So I will repeat here what I wrote to her:

"Oh I know full well that SS is playing both sides against the middle. SS can tell Donkeykong whatever he wants, I don't care. I cannot control what goes on in Donkeykong's house any more that Donkeykong can control what is going on in mine. Suffice to say that *IF* things go soth and and runs off to live with Daddy because things got too hot for him at our place, rest assured that SS's stepmom will have VERY LITTLE patience and have a few colorful metaphors to say.

Drac0's picture

Submitted by Drac0 on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 10:53am

That is her choice, and she is free to do that if she wants.

DW knows I love her and I will do anything for her and our marriage, but I have my limits and my limits were stated VERY clearly.

Sports Fan's picture

Submitted by Sports Fan on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 11:21am

My BS always knows his grades about a week or so before I can get them. The students have their own access at his school and they get the results first. He always knows what's coming. Maybe tall boy has similar access.

misSTEP's picture

Submitted by misSTEP on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 9:53am

Good for you Draco. And good for you being quick thinking on your feet with your responses to her!!

I guess the science teacher having it out for tallboy also made him fail in the OTHER class.

ctnmom's picture

Submitted by ctnmom on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 9:55am

He's at an age where he needs to make big decisions about his future. This is going to help him tremendously- don't back off. My youngest is 15- college isn't that far off for them. Of course I want her to be a kid and I don't want to hurt her feefees (LOLS), but a dose of reality is what these lazy kids need sometimes. My DD15 is very, very lazy and sloppy and sometimes I just gotta tell her how it's going to be. And guess what? You can tell DW that the world doesn't explode and the kid won't crumble into dust!!! Good for you Draco.

Drac0's picture

Submitted by Drac0 on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 10:07am

That was another thing. When it came to the cell phone, DW was dead set against me taking it because "What if there is an emergency?"

I said. "Gee DW. We didn't have cell phones as kids. How in the world did you and I survive past our teen years?"

So I didn't pull his cell phone away. Not yet anyway. This weekend, I'll purchase one of those flip-phones. So if there is an emergency, SS is covered.

StepKat's picture

Submitted by StepKat on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 10:18am

Get FamilyBase. You can put a 24 hour restriction on the phone (if it's a smart phone) and put numbers in the trusted contacts so that he can only text/talk to those trusted contacts. You can also turn off all data usage so he can't play online or download apps.

StepKat's picture

Submitted by StepKat on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 10:24am

Yup. It's only $4 extra a month. You can restrict so much but make your DW happy because he will still be able to text her, you, or dial 911 but can't do all the phone stuff or talk to friends.

Tuff Noogies's picture

Submitted by Tuff Noogies on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 11:11am

be careful with this tho', i dont think it blocks wifi. turing the wifi off will affect D and dw.

Flying.Purple.Step.Monster's picture

Submitted by Flying.Purple.S... on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 10:03am

I can't understand failing all of those classes. It's not like it's hard? Some kids have legitimate learning difficulties but this kid doesn't. If you pay attention in class, do the homework and study for tests then you should pass easily. If the kid is playing video games instead of studying then the parents aren't doing their job. A lot of this falls on DW.

slice_of_slife's picture

Submitted by slice_of_slife on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 10:19am

You are playing one on two. Good luck with that . I am not saying you are wrong, just...well...good luck with that.

Oh yeah, and enjoy your pats on the back from coworkers

ChiefGrownup's picture

Submitted by ChiefGrownup on Thu, 02/19/2015 - 2:38pm

Fantastic, Draco. Loved ss admitting the truth right in front of her.

Now, the next time she says "you're just puffing up your chest," tell her "You're just crippling your son because somehow it makes you feel like Ultimate Mommy."

Tell her you're actually trying to save the boy and you can even add that you once were a teen boy, something she can never claim, and you understand them better. That ought to give her something to ponder.