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doormatt's picture

Submitted by doormatt on Thu, 04/12/2012 - 7:24pm

Ok here goes....bear with me if I ramble please....dh is all mad at me because we have no money he says....both of us work and I pay the bills out of pay checks...there is a savings account with both our names on it that has several hundred dollars a month deposited into it from dh time in service...dh uses this for his own...no bills are paid out of this and he wants me to show him everybill and explain every cent I spend...however he wont tell me where he spends the other money....he is even threatening divorce...

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12yrstepmonster's picture

Submitted by 12yrstepmonster on Thu, 04/12/2012 - 7:36pm

Is show him. Honey this is the satck of bills, here's the checkbook.

You make % of total income (including his service time money)

I make % of money.

I will deposit my percentage of the bills into the account. And we will split the grocery bill when we go.

Then enjoy the stress free and keep you money!

doormatt's picture

Submitted by doormatt on Thu, 04/12/2012 - 8:10pm

No I don't spend frivolously...I get my hair cut maybe 2-3 a year..have not had a manicure in over 18 years...buy most of my clothes from goodwill and bargain shop...I can honestly say I don't do drugs or drink alcohol...don't gamble and have to justify to myself if I buy myself a 99 cent hamburger on occassion.

doormatt's picture

Submitted by doormatt on Thu, 04/12/2012 - 9:03pm

Just to clarify...the bills are paid out of both of our paychecks...he seems to think that would should be able to pay all the bills.. go on vacations and buy buy buy out of paychecks and him still be able to use savings for his personal use...he has rooms full of. Nfl. Stuff and a garage and storage building full of power tools and and always wants yo buy more...if I say we cant afford it then he goes off on me about bills...he has a serious spending problem but I get yelled at and threatened over money and bills...its crazy....just like he pitches a fit and criticizes my kids but whoa if I say one word about his precious 28year old princess....I am at the point of letting him go file for his divorce...I believe he might be in for a shock..

puppylove's picture

Submitted by puppylove on Thu, 04/12/2012 - 11:00pm

Doormatt, I am in a similar situation. I decided to open my own account and get my check direct deposited in there. He doesn't know yet. I don't actually plan on telling him.

I came into the marriage with no kids and no debt. I have paid off one of his (and his ex's) credit cards and have sunk plenty of money on more of his debt, his kids, and his problems. I came into this marriage with $10K in my account which maybe doeesn't sound like much to you guys but it was my savings, you know? I am going to build that back up in my own account.

You should separate the accounts and let him see how much money he really has left over for his bills, kids, crap, etc.