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So Mad at DF!!!

CompletelyPuzzled's picture

Submitted by CompletelyPuzzled on Mon, 04/14/2014 - 10:53am

I am so pissed at DF. We don't usually fight about the SDs. Ninety percent of our problems are with BM. But this is the stupidest fight we have ever had. DF and I are going to take the SDs and my Bios with us to get a family photo for Easter. We have been planning this forever. So I was going through the kid's clothes and finding things for everyone to wear. I had to buy my BD2 a new dress b/c her one from last year was 12 months and doesn't fit. BS8 had a nice shirt and khakis to wear. So DF asks about the SDs. I told him that SD9 has to get a new dress because her old one is way too tight. But SD7 got two dresses last year and one fits her perfectly so she doesn't need a new dress. Well apparently, I just said SD7 isn't as important as SD9 and BD2. He freaked out on me about how we had to get her a new dress. I told him that was ridiculous. So anyways, he tells me to get her a new dress even if it means I don't get one. I just looked at him like he was crazy. I have lost about 45lbs in the last year. My dress from a year ago looks like a tent on me. I told him that I wasn't doing that. I work two jobs and I can buy myself a damn dress if I want too. He started in on how is SD7 going to feel. I just don't understand this. SD7 has a dress that she got last year that fits and that she has never worn before. It still has the tags on it.

DF and I argued about it for a while and then he did the thing that really pissed me off. His mom called him to find out what she should get each of the kids for Easter. So DF tells his mom she needs to get SD7 a new dress because she is the only who isn't getting one. I love my future MIL. She says, DF, I bought her an extra dress last year so she would have one. I got them on sale. Why can't she wear that dress? She picked it out. Remember, she cried b/c we wouldn't let her wear it b/c it was too big. It should fit now.

Lol, DF came and apologized. He didn't want SD7's feelings to be hurt. It is weird. He isn't usually a Disney dad. I don't know what brought this on. I told him if he ever tells me I can't buy something for myself again, I will pull my finances and we can have completely separate finances. He apologized and I believe he means it. We have been together for several years and he has never pulled this crap before. But, I am still a little peeved. I told him it is going to take me sometime to get over it.

Comments

tabby yabba do's picture

Submitted by tabby yabba do on Mon, 04/14/2014 - 11:00am

Sounds like someone was on his man-period.

We all have irrational moments. Chalk it up to that? Sounds like he's normally a good guy who just picked a bad time to start a senseless fight. Try not to hold it against him?

hereiam's picture

Submitted by hereiam on Mon, 04/14/2014 - 11:05am

Just to make sure he gets the message, I would separated finances. At least have one account that is YOURS.

CompletelyPuzzled's picture

Submitted by CompletelyPuzzled on Mon, 04/14/2014 - 11:13am

I already do that. I put any CS into a separate account and use it for the kids. Usually, we buy any new clothes that they need, school supplies, etc. I also have my own savings account. I was married before and I know how devastating it can be if you don't have any separate finances.

askYOURdad's picture

Submitted by askYOURdad on Mon, 04/14/2014 - 11:40am

I was thinking that too. I realized I was holding my breath as soon as you said he told MIL thinking "wait for it..."

That could have gone so differently. I'm glad your DH came to his senses. It's understandable to be peeved but it's resolved so I would just file it away in the "don't hold grudges but remember facts" filing cabinet and move on.

Willow2010's picture

Submitted by Willow2010 on Mon, 04/14/2014 - 11:46am

So DF tells his mom she needs to get SD7 a new dress because she is the only who isn't getting one.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

WHAT? He told his mom that SHE needs to go get SD a new dress? WOW. Does he realize that neither you nor his MOTHER had sex with BM to create this child?

CompletelyPuzzled's picture

Submitted by CompletelyPuzzled on Mon, 04/14/2014 - 1:05pm

I don't really see a pattern of him becoming auto Disney and me standing firm. In fact, I am the one who usually gives in to the SDs. But in this situation, I don't think it would have changed things. He was so determined that I was somehow excluding SD7. I even said that the dress still had the tags on it. But the truth is, I don't know. I wasn't there last year when SD7 got the dress so I didn't know she cried and that it was his favorite. I saw her in the dress, but this all happened at his mom's house. DF and I weren't living together yet. It is very rare for him to get this upset about something so trivial. I think it was just his guilt getting to him. BM has been sending him countless emails and texts over the last few months about what a loser he is and what a lousy father. I really don't think it will happen again.

Disneyfan's picture

Submitted by Disneyfan on Mon, 04/14/2014 - 1:06pm

I understand him wanting the 7 year to get a new dress. What has me saying WTF is that he had the nerve to tell YOU to go without in order for HIS kid to get something.

misSTEP's picture

Submitted by misSTEP on Mon, 04/14/2014 - 2:57pm

I would have taken the dress with the tags on it, put it in the car and then brought it in with everyone else's clothing.

Not really, but guys wonder why women will lie to them? It is because to avoid stupid ass drama like this.

MarriedaBallessWonder's picture

Submitted by MarriedaBalless... on Mon, 04/14/2014 - 9:06pm

It gets worse after the wedding. Why marry into this misery? Seriously.